emotional bouts.

I feel so not me.
Like, i feel like an angry person.
Everything doesn't seem right to me.
I'm mad about almost everything.

you know the thing about this blog?

it doesn't depict my innermost thoughts anymore.
it doesn't make me vomit out my words anymore.

I've read and re-read my blog countless times,
and i ended up crying more than i could think about what to write.

damn.

love.

i'm still smiling like a budak tongong.
:)

so yes, sunday was the usuals jalanraya.
and i had funnn. :)

i'll spare the details and let the pictures do the talking.

me and hayyan
at my place with bblove.
at sabrina's.
hakim and feza
yana and qaira
hanizah and zalee
aein and sharun
syafiiq and radiah
sabrina and hannan.

and we even had a proposal for it,
which was hilarious, made by feza.

Supervising: Nur Liyana Bte Sardali aka Yapanok

Advisor: Saaaaafiq + Diyen Nak Fengsan Selalu

RSM (Raya Sergeant-Major): Fezah Nganga

Duty Medics: Hakim Kimmi Sleepy Co-Pilot + Hafiz Who lives in a Fishbowl
( Pandai2 carik plaster sendiri yaw' )

Tukang Amek Attendance: Zalee Yang Bakar Kuih @ 1am

Uniform Sensei: Sabrina Cherryade

Photo Commander In Chief: Saaaaafiq Tak tahu tapi Tuhan Tahu

Photo Commander On Recall Duty: Radiah Tickle-Me-Kenchit-With-A-Pen

Timekeeper aka tukang pekik-pekik: Qairawaneeeee + Diyen Nak Fengsan Selalu

Entertainment ICs: Nyza Makmekmok + Sharun Nizammm Bearbear

Tailong: Nur Liyana Bte Sardali aka Yapanok

Transport OIC: Sri Bunga Melati Aein + Hannan Slope Keep Away

Our Vision & Mission : the West to the East

superfunnayyy.
the pictures are all in facebook,
and its kinda laggy to download.
so just go to facebook and see k. :)

and, on monday..
bb didnt go to school, and we ended up going to birdpark instead. :)














and i have never really noticed,
that MY boyfriend has a freaking HOTTT BOD!
really.. he's got that V-shaped hotbod. *caircaircair...*

oh and i soooo wanna smile kambing when he said..

him: did i tell you that you look beautiful today?
me: nope
him: well, you look beautiful today

and i'm still smiling now. :)

and maybe we just had the manjerest ever phone conversation today. :)
i loike very much. =)

ilysm. muacks.

happenings.

it's been such a while since i posted something which updates about my life.

life has been such haywire.
such.. roller coaster, if i must say.

there were downs and ups, fun times, sad times.
and i'm just trying to go through it all with great patience.

school has been hectic.
4 projects. 2 projects down, oral presentation tmr, 1 more in 2 wks.
exams in a month.

i miss blogging.
but i just dont know what to write in here anymore.
times are different now.
i really want this diploma.
i'm really doing my best.

i've got great friends, classmates and lecturers.
i've got an understanding boyfriend.
i've got really good csm (suriati) and acsm (edwin) who understands my school times.
i've got supportive parents.

i just need this very bad.

everything else can wait i guess.

i miss the usuals so much.
i miss yana being in jurong.
i just miss the old times.

i havent meet the boyfriend for 2 weeks now.
i miss him daaaamn much.
haiz.. just can't wait for this sunday.
where i get to meet both the usuals and the boyfriend. :)


iloveyoufartoomuchtoletyougo.

Somebody is very proud of you.
Somebody is thinking of you.
Somebody is caring about you.
Somebody misses you.
Somebody wants to talk to you.
Somebody wants to be with you.
Somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
Somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
Somebody wants to hold your hand.
Somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
Somebody wants you to be happy.
Somebody wants you to find her.
Somebody is celebrating your successes.
Somebody wants to give you a gift.
Somebody thinks that you ARE a gift.
Somebody hopes you're not too cold, or too hot.
Somebody wants to hug you.
Somebody loves you.
Somebody admires your strength.
Somebody is thinking of you and smiling.
Somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on.
Somebody wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun.
Somebody thinks the world of you.
Somebody wants to protect you.
Somebody would do anything for you.

and that somebody.. is me.

tense times

maybe things are not as easy as they seem to be.
things cannot just be put it as simply.

or am i just making things difficult for myself?
i just don't know anymore.

make her the person who she was..
coz she has definitely lost herself.
and she wonder of her importance..
coz she doesnt know what is right or wrong anymore..
thus.. she keeps denying.

:)

happy giler can?



like, it's a first time for me to see my name like that.

i've had a freaking long day.
just wanna munch some more cookies that the bf's mom gave,
and off to sleep.
:)

challenges

it's 4 am!
and i still cannot sleep.

thinking.
pondering.
processing information.

whatever you call it.

too many problems arise at one time.
i'm just trying my very best to be strong about it.
for me, for everyone's sake.

am sure that i'm beginning to feel like my old self.
i don't know whether it's good or not.

hecking care can't be a good thing right?
running away doesnt solve things right?

haish. why all the challenges dear God?

misunderstood.

why am i making things very difficult?

i seriously don't know what to do,
and crying is the only way i can let all the sadness out.
you may not like it, but that's the only way i know.

i feel so stuck.
i don't have the strength to fight back.
i really don't.

i also don't know what else to answer.
i feel so misunderstood.

help.

spending spree. :)

ohh i suke sekali!

eversince i had my pay,
i've been spending and spending and spending.
:)

on the 10th of September,
after school, went to meet the boyfriend at queenstown.
and then met Yaty at Clarke Quay,
took bus to Hotel Miramar.
had Japanese buffet, LOVED IT!











syiok!
of course, there are loads of other pictures,
which i don't think it's possible to upload all of em here.
haha.

and these were the people involved!
















so after the whole thing,
akie came to fetch yaty.
so it was left with me and bf.

thought of taking cab home,
so we searched for atm,
and at the same time went around to look at nightlife.
well, more like, he showed me what nightlife is.

so we walked, from Miramar, to Clarke Quay, to Boat Quay,
to Singapore River to outskirts of City Hall,
and.. we ended up at the same bus stop that we took the bus to Miramar earlier.
=_="

and i thought he forgot.
which he didnt. :)
"you think i will always forget like you ah? i remember okay our 6th mths!"
:))

so we took cab from there.
friggin long day.

yesterday, at work,
yana and fiiq weren't working,
but they came back to do measurement for the new uniform.
so went out to IMM after Qaira picked us up,
while i was on my 1 hour lunchbreak.

i wanted to find my work shoes,
but there was no charles and keith there.
and yana ended up buying her sandals.

and we ended up spending at watsons,
which i spent $72 just buying..

- 2 rexonas.
- za 2 way cake
- maybelline mascara
- bourjois blush
- 1 sunsilk hair cream

then left work at 5 coz i had a major headache.
and decided to thread my eyebrow and buy facial cleanser and hair dye.

today,
mampos.
after work, went to jurong point with yana,
in search of work shoes again.
charles and keith jurong point customer svc sucks.
so, decided not to buy there.
and went around.. after and hour plus,
i managed to grab 2 shoes.
but, not work ones.
it's for raya. :))







thanks woman for following me,
and keeping my spirits up. :)



and reached home.
went out again with mom and the bros to buke at Mac.
and I GOT MY MEGA MCSPICY!!



and that ended my spending spree.
hmm, maybe going to bf's place to send the kuihs that ibu bought for his mum.
haish.. tired.