Monday, May 28, 2007

I AM BORED

A SAGITTARIUS LADY.

A tall slim and graceful woman who walked proudly
like she is walking in a
beauty pageant competition. If she slips or nearly
falls, she will nicely
covered it up and continue with her graceful and
impressive walking step.
She knows how to use make up to enhance her
beauty. She looks at the world
positively, so her face always seem so happy. She
will not get up set
easily.

Self confident woman who belief in her own style.
She will not follow
fashion, but standing in between simplicity and too
modern. She is a very
open person, sometimes can be too blunt. She is
an honest person and never
try to cause troubles for any one.

She likes to say something that you do not want to
hear
and yet she can say
something so pleasing at the same time
. Example
she may say "I wish you
could make more money, so you could afford
better cloth, but anyway it is
better this way. If you make more money you could
be thinking of money too
much and become greedy". She can say such
thing and make you wonder if you
should get up set or love her more.

She is also a free spirit and does not like to stay
home
.
She likes to be
protected
, but not to give her orders
. She has no
respect
to a weak man
.
If
she try to over powered you, then you have to calm
her down and try to
control her to be in a limit by doing the same thing
too. She will listen if
she respect you.
She likes to be herself and likes
her guy to be himself.

She is a no nonsense woman, so you will not hear
she says " Guess what I
will do next", or "Guess what I am thinking"
because she always say what she
is thinking out loud
like a guy. If you do not
understand her in this
matter, you could easily break up with her. She
sees problems in her love
life as another funny story.

She is clumsy and it is in her nature. You may
think it is cute, but for
some neat guys this could be so unbearable. She
is very friendly, so she can
easily turn her enemy to be her friends. She has
good taste in fine cloths,
good food, first class and first services. Even a
poor woman in this Zodiac
will struggle to afford such good taste. She could
spent lots of money as if
she can not understand how difficult it is to make
money. If you think of
let her borrow money, think again.

She is a paranoid. If she thinks you like her, she
may already think about
getting marry and lost her freedom and so on and
on. A jolly woman who loves
sports. She is an ordinary woman who could dress
like a tomboy
. She has more
guy friends
and sometimes could act like one of a
guy
.
She does not care
about rumors
, so she can get home very late and
couldn't careless what her
neighbor will gossip about her. She thinks either
good or bad, you will know
it yourself , so you should not bother what people
think.

Her wit and innocent look are her charms. She is
often hurt from love, but
never afraid to look for a new one as if she is
singing "Do that to me one
more time". She likes going straight and being
straight forward
. She will
not go around to get what she wants, or beat
around the bush just to say
something. If you meet her and tell her straight
what you think, she will
admire you.


“HOW BAD IS YOUR TEMPER ACCORDING TO YOUR HOROSCOPE?”

SAGITTARIUS NOVEMBER 22 – DECEMBER 20

You are insensible and generally have no complete control over your emotions. You do get angry quickly and others marvel at your anger levels even when provoked. Actually, you get tongue-tied when angry and you will remove your anger waiting for the other person to calm down. Then you will reason with your opponent and convince the other person in a very gentle manner that the whole thing was just his mistake. You’re also likely to totally sever ties with someone when you’re upset with them.


i'm just plain bored.

and plain free to blog twice.

i can't wait for 530!

iloveyousomuchthatitreallyhurts.

random.

lemau.

i like microeconomics. but it would definitely be so much better if there weren't any graphs in it. it's so irritating to understand graphs. not that i was never good in maths but microecons graphs are so effing bleargh.

i'm growing sacks of eyebags. *random*

work has been crazy. like, really. not that i'm trying to be racist or what -coz i'm not one- but i really think that north indians are uncivilised lot of people. they push, they rush, they don't know how to follow the queue and they ask stupid questions. it's hard to be nice to these people especially when they get on your nerves.

yesterday this north indian lady tried to jump (as in LITERALLY jump) from 2nd railing to the 1st railing. and so, i screamed "DON'T PUSH AROUND!" and guess what, just after i said that, she fell.

and so, i mocked her and said "There you go.."

I think they're just so uncivilised people lah.

I mean, i have NEVER EVER in my whole life seen any Singaporean Indians act like that before. Singaporean Indians are so different from North India Indians. Singaporean Indians, no matter how rowdy they can get, they're still civilised and they're nice people. North Indians are generally the opposite.

I'm not alone in this but some of their tour guides can't even stand their tour members and sometimes, they're just beyond control.

And once, i heard this North Indian guy said, "Sentosa Island is full of Indians.."

so tell me, how do u think we survive them?

heck. forget it.

I'm estatic. I'm excited.

can't wait for training later so i can FINALLY spill the beans. HEHHEH.

laters.

Friday, May 25, 2007

emotions broke lose.

i'm going fucken crazy.

i'm just hoping that this class ends fast. coz i really cant stand everybody here. even the faci. if i didnt think that i need to be online, i wouldnt come again today. heck this chinatown uh. u can say anything if you all want lah.

i did something which i would probably regret sooner or later.

i subscribed back to anak melayu. hurhur. it's the last resort to kill my boredom. and plus, i need new friends. it's been like 4 months since i last subscribe. haha. it feels weird being back. i totally forgot what it's like being there. but i'm just gonna make it a point to get to know people from the arts scene. no exchanging numbers and such.

and i just read my sticky notes sent and received.

and i so happen to go to this profile and i read all the sticky notes sent and received. and just a simple "hi.. u in dk??" can lead to a friendship till now.

September 2005. till this very day. 1 year plus. wouhh.

stop the tears in my eyes.
stop the hurt in my heart.
never take the love away.
coz it's you whom i want to stay.


Sway - The Perishers.

I talk to you as to a friend
I hope that’s what you’ve
come to be
It feels as though we’ve
made amends
Like we found a way
eventually

It was you who picked
the pieces up
When I was a broken soul
And then glued me
back together
Returned to me what
others stole

I don’t wanna hurt you
I don’t wanna make you sway
Like I know I’ve done before
I will not do it anymore
I’ve always been a dreamer
I've had my head among
the clouds
Now that I’m coming down
Won’t you be my solid ground?

I look at you and see a friend
I hope that’s what you wanna be
Are we back now where
it all began?
Have you finally forgiven me?

You gathered my dreams in
When they all blew away
And then tricked them
back into me
You saved me I was
almost dead

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

the pantat family

yesterday's chalet was okay.

reached vivo at 730.. settled my phone and bill, then waited for the pantats till 830 and we reached the chalet at 915. and, to my surprise la.. there were like 5 people there. only. LOL. i thought it was gonna be happening or what but it turned out okay lar. there is only chicken there but it was damn nice laaaa.

then, drank, played taiti, 21 and whatever card games there were and fagged.

was out from there at 10.30 and went back with Taufiq.

Yesterday was like a reunion for Pantats after a very long time. Like, there were 5 of us out of 8 coz Nami is never around.

We have AizadPantat Paprik- the founder of Pantats


Next, the assistant Faiz Pantat Pattaya

Next, the members: Pantat Goreng

Pantat Original:

Pantat Bulat

Pantat Seafood:


Pantat Cool Dude with long hair:
*takde pic uh*

Pantat Kuali:
*takde pic uh*

and lastly...

Pantat Panggang:


Yeahhhh. So, basically, that's the Pantat family. The people who stick through thick and thin together and the only bunch of people who have so much trust in each other. We're not just best friends but we're like siblings already.

but, soon one by one will go off. NS or whaaaat.

but,

once a pantat, always a pantat.

=)

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

serious. seriously bedek.

i'm serious.

i'm seriously lazy to update my blog. but i've got to update to kill time in this oh so boring class.

but first, reply to tags..

mizz rai: hey hun, i agree w arip. stay focused and be professional. i trust u too dee. make me proud even though me wawa lala and arip didnt had the opportunity to. =) OH! i lupa nk kasi u my link! *bodoh rai*
==> hey rai~ thanks for your trust. i seriously hope i can bring the group to success and make u guys proud. =) haha.. thanks for the link..

'SHACUTE™: BOOOOOOOO! I Was Here. Heh! Ilah Dengan Penuh Semangat Letak Full Name. LOL! :P
==> BOOOO BACK. LOL. Alah.. standard arr.. si Jalilah Bte Hassan memang macam gitu. takkan hang tak tau nohh. lolz

attica: babe, would you mind changing the PHASHION.STARR to ATTICA instead? ty. & u tc hunss. (:
==> sure will babe. u tc too.

Restive-Jazz: Oh My Goodness!! Well Done FoR DK!! I Knew U'll Pull It Off.. Missing U Lyk Heaven LaRh.. WoRkin Now.. Susah To Hav FRee Tym.. But When I Do, We'll Chill Yeah?? Call Me Anytime.. Always HeRe FoR U.. :
==> I MISS YOU SOOOO MUCH LAAH. =( plsplspls be free soon.

Niezza: hey.. now i understand why u were feeling fucked up in ur last post.. Well.. hope for the best ya.. Hopefully things will go as what u guys had initially planned.. So see ya.. Cheers!!
==> Hope so.. =)

wai: well dee, DK looks like it's doing fine, thanks to your efforts! Anyway, relac abit when you have to okay? =)
==> thanks Shaun.. haha.. i'll try to relax IF i can. =)

boom: chicka? prasan pe?! puke!
==> why do i even bother to copy this?

okay.. last Friday, we had a Welcome Tea Party and.. These are all the pictures of my dikir girls.. (and a guy coz Firdaus Samat sebok. LOL)


Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
keselengean me and fir samat

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
the two kecohrable people. fai and fir

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket


so yeah, that's my dikir peeps fyi. cool bunch of people.

tonight, might head down to Venga's chalet at Costa Sand's Sentosa. I need to destress. oh speak of the devil, he just signed it. haha. he was like, come laa.. got drinks and alcohol all. i was like.. OKAY. haha. like, he's trying to lure me to come coz he's going to NS soon. Not nice lah if i don't go.. And summore, got Uncle Nadaraj there. so, yeah.. might go and get myself high on drinks and fags.

i'm just a normal human being. i have flaws. so deal with that.

i didnt mean to say what i said. not that i meant it in a bad way.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

cruel

THANKS SO MUCH LIFE FOR BEING CRUEL TO ME.
THANKS FOR TAKING AWAY ALL MY PRIZED POSSESSIONS.

THANKS FOR TAKING AWAY THE PERSON THAT I LOVE SO MUCH.
THANKS FOR TAKING AWAY MY WALLET.
THANKS FOR TAKING AWAY MY HANDPHONE.

WHAT NEXT HUH?

WHY DO YOU KEEP STRESSING ME UP?

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

FUCK LIFE

i've decided to delete away some links coz, most of them've changed links and no point keeping them right?

watched Jangan Pandang Belakang yesterday and it was spuki (ooppth..spuki lah sangat..) i mean spooky lah. but Pierre Andre was freaking good and Mak Mah too. gosh.. and please lah. i watched it alone sak. spuki terus. but the row behind me were all makcik2 and they were so noisy lah can. and they melatah. omg. they made people laugh instead of scared. hahaha.

OK FUCK.

NOW,I'VE LOST MY HANDPHONE.

SCREW!!!!

LIFE JUST DOESNT GET ANY BETTER FOR ME!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

dikir-ing

ytd dikir was a success.

the girls were more than the guys. that, i'm happy about.
everyone's semangat. that's cool.
the instructors were great, that's cool too.
everyone had fun, that's the greatest thing.

yeah, could see that the ex-boyfriend had fun too.

suddenly, the confidence went low again. i know i have all the reasons to be confident. we have good manpower. good support from cikgu. good instructors.

but the problem is..

no one can change this fear. fear that what happend last year, might be repeated. i hate failure. the one most absolute thing which i would not condone. i don't want Dylz to die halfway like it did last time.

and the most important thing..

the biggest challenge is my emotions.

what more, with me being the rebanist, the frustration is going to mount. with ex-boyfriend being there, it gets harder for me.

i've never said that i'm going to forget you baby.
now, i really can't forget you.
i get jealous.
coz i iwant you all for myself.

i love you. i really do.

Thursday, May 03, 2007

personas.

i know online people think i'm really stuck up. oh no, i should rewrite that.

i know online guys think i'm really stuck up. that sounds better.

i don't chat much. halfway i'd ignore their messages. or i'd give 1 word answers. yeah sure, i'm unfriendly. thank you. i don't really care much when it comes to online people. i used to have an online persona. PunkChiCka to ChiCka LoLiTa.

both of them made lots of friends online. Both were popular on AnakMelayu, they were regulars even. both knew how to make friends stay. and were often, online and had the time to enjoy and have fun.

now the persona changed to ChiCka Emily.

ChiCka Emily (Emily given by Leanna-Jazz) is more reserved. Created late last year, ChiCka Emily didnt make as many friends as both PunkChiCka and ChiCka LoLiTa. Emily is more laidback, more quiet and she keeps a lot of her feelings in her. She doesnt even want to be bothered about guys.

it was only until she decided to give it a chance, hoping that this guy could make her happy. he did. but only for a short time due to the complications of which, both of them know.

and Emily, she's moping around. hurt, obviously. the grudge in her, the pain and the anger. but deep down, she's still in love with him.

the task now, to merge all 3 together. PunkChiCka to ChiCka LoLiTa to ChiCka Emily INTO ChiCka.

hard task. But, i'm sure it's do-able.

only that i need more time.

okay dang, quite a few ppl know that i have peavey. i love peavey. really, a lot. if i can, i wanna show the whole world what peavey can do but i can't. amanah orang tak boleh main2. he said to me, "... jgn byk tangan. u sorg and someone u trust jer"

how?

geez.

just like i've expected.
my hopes were dashed again.

that's why i don't like to put on so much hopes. they're easily dashed. oh heck. anybody up for a movie marathon this saturday?

i wanna get away. but i don't know to where.

i just wanna go somewhere; alone. i want to think. i want to relax. i fucking need a break.

and can u like, don't fucking disturb me asshole. if i don't reply, shoo off! stop disturbing me. i seriously hate leeches.

fuck.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

depressing.

i realise that most of my recent posts were depressing and about my depression.

there's just so many things that has been bothering my mind and it's so bottled up.
leanna.. where're you..

i feel that i'm gonna burst one day. i already did 2 nights ago and it made me late for work. i have never been so serious in my life. i feel that i'm changing. for better for worse? i don't know. i'm not the person i used to be. the person with strong determination and willpower. the person who doesnt know how to give up.

now, i'm just someone who gives up easily, breakdown easily and i'm a damn bloody weakling already.

fuck.

i want my ego, which is gone. somewhere.

he smsed me last night. i've got mixed feelings about it. i was happy that he msged. but i keep fearing that he wouldnt reply my msg. the fear and the happiness. its making me nuts. it was kinda slow.. but, hopefully, i get what i'm hoping for.





and i personally love this one the best.




i don't fall in love that easily.
but once i do, i fall really hard.