so i haven't been updating.
net's been cut off at home and i've been freaking busy working these few days. now i'm at the beach carpark. huhu.. just finished drinking glen's. hahaha. dayymmn.
nothing much has been happening. dunno wad to update too.
so, yeah, when school reopen, that's when my next update is gonna be.
till then, take care.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
think.
time check: 0420 hrs.
ahh yes. i'm still not asleep. not that i can't sleep. i think it sleepless nights always happen to me when my mind is clouded with things which i need to think about and things which i can't get off from my mind. thus, when my sleeping time has been altered, that means, i'll be suffering from humongous eyebags.
abang zaid expects an answer from me tomorrow. and, i only have a vague idea of the answer. he needs a definite answer. i'm gonna be screwed.
yes, he is trying to help me straighten out my thinking. it's just me who's been ignorant about it. that is so me. ignorant as always.
he asked me this.
"do you think you're prepared to be in a relationship? and, do you even think that you're prepared to fall in love?"
ohhh i hate it when someone knows me too well. coz they make me think of something which i don't ever wanna think.
he gave me 2 days to think about it. and it's due in less than 12 hours.
ahh well, he thinks that i'm in a state of denial. yesyes, i know i am. but it's for my own good. he says i'm being unfair to myself.
it's better that i be unfair to myself than i hurt myself.
okay, the whole thing came up because:
abang zaid thinks that i like shahid because he reminds me of amy. so, in actual fact, i don't really like shahid but i like amy. get the picture? pls try to get it coz it's hard for me to explain.
damn it.
i hate it when someone gives me a reality check.
i have to think of an answer like, real soon.
it's 0430 hrs. i'm supposed to wake up in 1 1/2 hrs. yeah geee. i'll be out of society today. will be stationed at the beach tram stop. yeah, like thanks eh cik jamilah.
oh fuck.
no sleep + beach tram stop = TOTAL DISASTER!
fuckfuckfuck.
i hate taking trains in the morning. BAHHHH~ the only route i can think of now is to take the train from lakeside to boonlay and bounce back to Outram.
it's so not gonna be my day.
hopefully, i get to see shahid. =)
ok. that's it. one stick and go to sleep and hopefully, wake up in time.
muchlove.
ahh yes. i'm still not asleep. not that i can't sleep. i think it sleepless nights always happen to me when my mind is clouded with things which i need to think about and things which i can't get off from my mind. thus, when my sleeping time has been altered, that means, i'll be suffering from humongous eyebags.
abang zaid expects an answer from me tomorrow. and, i only have a vague idea of the answer. he needs a definite answer. i'm gonna be screwed.
yes, he is trying to help me straighten out my thinking. it's just me who's been ignorant about it. that is so me. ignorant as always.
he asked me this.
"do you think you're prepared to be in a relationship? and, do you even think that you're prepared to fall in love?"
ohhh i hate it when someone knows me too well. coz they make me think of something which i don't ever wanna think.
he gave me 2 days to think about it. and it's due in less than 12 hours.
ahh well, he thinks that i'm in a state of denial. yesyes, i know i am. but it's for my own good. he says i'm being unfair to myself.
it's better that i be unfair to myself than i hurt myself.
okay, the whole thing came up because:
abang zaid thinks that i like shahid because he reminds me of amy. so, in actual fact, i don't really like shahid but i like amy. get the picture? pls try to get it coz it's hard for me to explain.
damn it.
i hate it when someone gives me a reality check.
i have to think of an answer like, real soon.
it's 0430 hrs. i'm supposed to wake up in 1 1/2 hrs. yeah geee. i'll be out of society today. will be stationed at the beach tram stop. yeah, like thanks eh cik jamilah.
oh fuck.
no sleep + beach tram stop = TOTAL DISASTER!
fuckfuckfuck.
i hate taking trains in the morning. BAHHHH~ the only route i can think of now is to take the train from lakeside to boonlay and bounce back to Outram.
it's so not gonna be my day.
hopefully, i get to see shahid. =)
ok. that's it. one stick and go to sleep and hopefully, wake up in time.
muchlove.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
sighness
the story of the girl was lame. i guess. haha well. i don't know laaaaa.
amy called me just now. hurhur. gile. ingat funfair pe nak call2 org?? LOL! tu motor gi scrap sudah laaaa. kwangg3.. mengamuk seh member when i said that. wakakaka.
i'm like online at 1.23 am! like, miraculously i've got net.
work was fine. was at beach tram stop. geez.
didnt see Shahid today at work. haiiz. and my aunt said that my ranger uncle (her husband) told her that Shahid is a DKK. well, if you don't know, ask around. i've no idea too.
i am in utter boredom!
amy called me just now. hurhur. gile. ingat funfair pe nak call2 org?? LOL! tu motor gi scrap sudah laaaa. kwangg3.. mengamuk seh member when i said that. wakakaka.
i'm like online at 1.23 am! like, miraculously i've got net.
work was fine. was at beach tram stop. geez.
didnt see Shahid today at work. haiiz. and my aunt said that my ranger uncle (her husband) told her that Shahid is a DKK. well, if you don't know, ask around. i've no idea too.
i am in utter boredom!
Friday, February 09, 2007
a story of a girl.
everybody has a story to tell.
everybody has a secret about themselves.
names have been changed to protect the identity of the people involved. (yeah right)
this. is the story of this girl.
this girl has a history waaay back.
Dec 2005. She got to know this guy named Tabby, who works as a ranger at her workplace, while she was getting to know James. So when 2006 came, she met James and they became a couple.
One day, She was hospitalised. James didnt visit her. Tabby did. It was the first time they met each other but she realised that she enjoyed spending time with Tabby more than James.
As her relationship went on, she realised that, she was much much closer to Tabby than James and she began having feelings for Tabby.
She was hospitalised again. and again, Tabby was there.
After a while, her relationship with James deteriorated because of her busy-ness and also because of her parents. James asked for a breakup soon after. She went berserk. She went nuts. she cried. and she cried. and she cried non stop.
but Tabby came in. Tabby talked to her and cheered her up. along with her other friends and family members, they cheered her up and got her back her strength.
and then, Tabby was gone. she didnt know where he went. she missed him so much. and one day he got back to her. he was different. like suddenly he gave her hope. and he dashed it.
but she guessed, her feelings have been in too deep that she kept on loving him.
and one day, when he said he was madly in love with a girl she knew, she cried. and she cried again. she thought,
"Why can't he realise that i'm the one who has been loving him all these while? and why does he keep letting himself get hurt by other girls?"
but, because she loved him, and she wanted him to be happy, she stuck on to him as his good friend. she would advise him, give him strength and make him happy so that he can go on with his pursuit on that girl, since he believed that he really loved her.
one night, Tabby came over to her place and they decided to slack at the void deck. so she brought over her guitar and let Tabby play her guitar. and she teared. Tabby was hurt. She was certain of it. He looked angry but in fact, he was hurt.
At that time, it was hard for her too.
Her friend. His friend. Az told her that he loved her all these while and was pestering her to get into a relationship with him. But she couldn't bring herself to. She loved Tabby.
It was a confusing scene for her. Az loved her. She loved Tabby. Tabby loved the other girl.
She rejected Az but only to know that he made a rumor about her and told Tabby about it. 2 am, she received the meanest message from Tabby, saying good luck in her relationship. She was so fucked up. She tried all sorts of ways to get the message across that she wasnt attached.
and she said this to Tabby..
"why can't u realise that i'm the one who has been loving u all along?"
and he said.
"i don't know why until now, we can't be in a relationship"
she cried. it hurts her too bad. and she realised, thats it. it hurts too much.
so she fell silent. she didnt contact him anymore. it was for a few months, until he came online and told her that he was sack from his workplace.
and that was the end of them.
until recently, she was at work. and she saw this ranger at her workplace. and she teared seeing him.
she thought, it was Tabby. But when she came over to talk to him, it wasn't. His name was Sam. He looked like Tabby, talked like Tabby.
and now, she realised, she likes Sam.
She doesnt know, whether she is in a state of denial. whether, her feelings for Sam was because he reminded her of Tabby.
But the thing that hurt her the most, was that she knew Tabby but she barely know Sam. that hurts her the most.
and now, all is left to fate.
much love,
ChiCka
everybody has a secret about themselves.
names have been changed to protect the identity of the people involved. (yeah right)
this. is the story of this girl.
this girl has a history waaay back.
Dec 2005. She got to know this guy named Tabby, who works as a ranger at her workplace, while she was getting to know James. So when 2006 came, she met James and they became a couple.
One day, She was hospitalised. James didnt visit her. Tabby did. It was the first time they met each other but she realised that she enjoyed spending time with Tabby more than James.
As her relationship went on, she realised that, she was much much closer to Tabby than James and she began having feelings for Tabby.
She was hospitalised again. and again, Tabby was there.
After a while, her relationship with James deteriorated because of her busy-ness and also because of her parents. James asked for a breakup soon after. She went berserk. She went nuts. she cried. and she cried. and she cried non stop.
but Tabby came in. Tabby talked to her and cheered her up. along with her other friends and family members, they cheered her up and got her back her strength.
and then, Tabby was gone. she didnt know where he went. she missed him so much. and one day he got back to her. he was different. like suddenly he gave her hope. and he dashed it.
but she guessed, her feelings have been in too deep that she kept on loving him.
and one day, when he said he was madly in love with a girl she knew, she cried. and she cried again. she thought,
"Why can't he realise that i'm the one who has been loving him all these while? and why does he keep letting himself get hurt by other girls?"
but, because she loved him, and she wanted him to be happy, she stuck on to him as his good friend. she would advise him, give him strength and make him happy so that he can go on with his pursuit on that girl, since he believed that he really loved her.
one night, Tabby came over to her place and they decided to slack at the void deck. so she brought over her guitar and let Tabby play her guitar. and she teared. Tabby was hurt. She was certain of it. He looked angry but in fact, he was hurt.
At that time, it was hard for her too.
Her friend. His friend. Az told her that he loved her all these while and was pestering her to get into a relationship with him. But she couldn't bring herself to. She loved Tabby.
It was a confusing scene for her. Az loved her. She loved Tabby. Tabby loved the other girl.
She rejected Az but only to know that he made a rumor about her and told Tabby about it. 2 am, she received the meanest message from Tabby, saying good luck in her relationship. She was so fucked up. She tried all sorts of ways to get the message across that she wasnt attached.
and she said this to Tabby..
"why can't u realise that i'm the one who has been loving u all along?"
and he said.
"i don't know why until now, we can't be in a relationship"
she cried. it hurts her too bad. and she realised, thats it. it hurts too much.
so she fell silent. she didnt contact him anymore. it was for a few months, until he came online and told her that he was sack from his workplace.
and that was the end of them.
until recently, she was at work. and she saw this ranger at her workplace. and she teared seeing him.
she thought, it was Tabby. But when she came over to talk to him, it wasn't. His name was Sam. He looked like Tabby, talked like Tabby.
and now, she realised, she likes Sam.
She doesnt know, whether she is in a state of denial. whether, her feelings for Sam was because he reminded her of Tabby.
But the thing that hurt her the most, was that she knew Tabby but she barely know Sam. that hurts her the most.
and now, all is left to fate.
much love,
ChiCka
Thursday, February 08, 2007
sooo happy lahhh.
like, i am so happy~
wheee.
yesterday, after wasting $7 on a stupid movie, (the last king of scotland), i went to sentosa to find Abang Nazree. but only to know that he didnt come for work coz he overslept. lolz. okay so, Nazmi and Taufiq were there. and they were like, asking me to go and watch the soccer match lah that they were gonna play under sentosa.
and their excuse was:
"SHAHID is gonna be there!!"
i'm like, thanks eh!
geez. but yeah lah.. i followed them to the ranger station to wait for Abang Nazree. Okay so he came, and.. guess what??
Shahid was in the van as well.
hahaha.. like crap kan?? but he went down at the merlion bus stop to take the express out to vivo coz his bike is there. so yeah, then we met again at the PSA Club's pitch.
and i watched THEM play. haha. please eh. i didnt just watch him play. i watched the rest as well.
OHHHH!
he's a LEFT-LEGGER LIKE ME!!!!
whooooooo!
lolz. okay so screw. i was blushing half the time and i was so unlike myself. i was quiet. hahaa.
so yeah, hahaha. =)
the only question.
WHAT'S WITH ME AND RANGERS??
nyahhahaha.
wheee.
yesterday, after wasting $7 on a stupid movie, (the last king of scotland), i went to sentosa to find Abang Nazree. but only to know that he didnt come for work coz he overslept. lolz. okay so, Nazmi and Taufiq were there. and they were like, asking me to go and watch the soccer match lah that they were gonna play under sentosa.
and their excuse was:
"SHAHID is gonna be there!!"
i'm like, thanks eh!
geez. but yeah lah.. i followed them to the ranger station to wait for Abang Nazree. Okay so he came, and.. guess what??
Shahid was in the van as well.
hahaha.. like crap kan?? but he went down at the merlion bus stop to take the express out to vivo coz his bike is there. so yeah, then we met again at the PSA Club's pitch.
and i watched THEM play. haha. please eh. i didnt just watch him play. i watched the rest as well.
OHHHH!
he's a LEFT-LEGGER LIKE ME!!!!
whooooooo!
lolz. okay so screw. i was blushing half the time and i was so unlike myself. i was quiet. hahaa.
so yeah, hahaha. =)
the only question.
WHAT'S WITH ME AND RANGERS??
nyahhahaha.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
FUCCCK
BLOODY FUCKKKKK!!!
i kena fine $50 siakk for smoking at the overhead bridge. bloody ass of a security guard. fucking cheebye!!
fucked up giler man. it's just a first warning wad.. fuck. ok so fuck. i don't wanna think about it.
my weekend was great i guess. had soccer on saturday morning. yeah. and we lost. howells, so much for soccer. and work, was ok on saturday. nothing much happend.
but on sunday, i was so happyyyy lah..
ok, so i met Fadli at Harbourfront at 9. then, we started work at 10 but we reached Siloso Point at 10.30. and when i was teaching Fadli the stuff about Siloso Point, the Ranger came. and i had no idea why, i turned my head and looked at him all the way till he stopped his bike. fuck. i made it look so obvious. i mean, like, c'mon lahhh. its been a month since i last saw him.
and, when i went for the 1.30 dolphin show, he was there. omggggg.
and, i saw him like, from time to time lah.
abang zaid didnt help much too. he finally knew who i was referring to. and he wanted to get his number for me. and i was like, no way! like, maluuuu lah. and he said,
"abang tgk dian terlompat2 biler nampak dia. muka merah2, kalahkan clown!"
(whenever u see him, i'll see you jumping around, and u'll blush. even clowns will lose out!)
thanks eh!
then, he called me up when i was busy.. and you know what he said...
"Dian.. he's right in front of me.. your pretty boy.. cute nye dier.. so handsome.."
i was like.. WAHLAO EHHHH!
geeez!
then, after work, my parents wanted to pick me and my ranger uncle up. so, i said, i'll wait at the ranger station (was hoping that i could see him lah.) but well, i didnt.
howells... that's it. i won't be able to see him in a long time.
and not that it helped that my uncle also mentioned Thabri's name in front of me. haha. and i said to my uncle at the ranger station, in front of the k-9 dog:
"si Shahid looks like Thabri."
and the dog suddenly barked non-stop.
so my uncle said: "jangan cakap nama Thabri depan dia. Dia takleh dengar nama Thabri".
(don't say Thabri's name in front of him. He can't hear Thabri's name)
LOL. whatever eh.
but like, i' feeling down uh. i don't know. whenever i think about him, i feel... helpless. low self-esteem. haiiz. i don't know lah eh.
gonna skip 3rd meeting tmr to go to Sentosa.
haiiiz.
and ohhh.
i wanna buy that top! but, i just don't want it to make my boobs jut out so much.
but i bought this top at forever 21.
and yeah, loookkkk!!! my new helmet~!
ok done. see y'all.
i kena fine $50 siakk for smoking at the overhead bridge. bloody ass of a security guard. fucking cheebye!!
fucked up giler man. it's just a first warning wad.. fuck. ok so fuck. i don't wanna think about it.
my weekend was great i guess. had soccer on saturday morning. yeah. and we lost. howells, so much for soccer. and work, was ok on saturday. nothing much happend.
but on sunday, i was so happyyyy lah..
ok, so i met Fadli at Harbourfront at 9. then, we started work at 10 but we reached Siloso Point at 10.30. and when i was teaching Fadli the stuff about Siloso Point, the Ranger came. and i had no idea why, i turned my head and looked at him all the way till he stopped his bike. fuck. i made it look so obvious. i mean, like, c'mon lahhh. its been a month since i last saw him.
and, when i went for the 1.30 dolphin show, he was there. omggggg.
and, i saw him like, from time to time lah.
abang zaid didnt help much too. he finally knew who i was referring to. and he wanted to get his number for me. and i was like, no way! like, maluuuu lah. and he said,
"abang tgk dian terlompat2 biler nampak dia. muka merah2, kalahkan clown!"
(whenever u see him, i'll see you jumping around, and u'll blush. even clowns will lose out!)
thanks eh!
then, he called me up when i was busy.. and you know what he said...
"Dian.. he's right in front of me.. your pretty boy.. cute nye dier.. so handsome.."
i was like.. WAHLAO EHHHH!
geeez!
then, after work, my parents wanted to pick me and my ranger uncle up. so, i said, i'll wait at the ranger station (was hoping that i could see him lah.) but well, i didnt.
howells... that's it. i won't be able to see him in a long time.
and not that it helped that my uncle also mentioned Thabri's name in front of me. haha. and i said to my uncle at the ranger station, in front of the k-9 dog:
"si Shahid looks like Thabri."
and the dog suddenly barked non-stop.
so my uncle said: "jangan cakap nama Thabri depan dia. Dia takleh dengar nama Thabri".
(don't say Thabri's name in front of him. He can't hear Thabri's name)
LOL. whatever eh.
but like, i' feeling down uh. i don't know. whenever i think about him, i feel... helpless. low self-esteem. haiiz. i don't know lah eh.
gonna skip 3rd meeting tmr to go to Sentosa.
haiiiz.
and ohhh.
i wanna buy that top! but, i just don't want it to make my boobs jut out so much.but i bought this top at forever 21.
and yeah, loookkkk!!! my new helmet~!
ok done. see y'all.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
heex.
Sandybobandy's display pic is superrrhot. hahaha. yeah2, she likes looking sexy. HAHA.i am superhungry lah can.
ahh so anyways, people, when you look at the pics on the right side, don't think that Irfan's my boyfriend okay. He's just a very close friend. that's all. nope, not my boyfriend. and nope, i do not have a boyfriend. =)
i'm hating my faci. i'm hating the module.
and, i'm hungry.
baaaaaah.
soccer training today!! goshh. it's been ages since i last played soccer laaah. last year was like, the last time i played soccer. ishishish. i'm freaking rusty already. but i guess sid and the gang have faith in me thats why they're asking me to play. i'm not hoping for anything much, i'm just gonna have fun. =)
lunch, pls.
thankyouverymuch.
i had this.
i know, it doesnt look that nice. it doesnt taste very nice either. but, well, it did made me full.
and...
I LOVE TODAY BECAUSE WE CAM-WHORED!!
Me and Farah and Syasya cam-whored today.. =)
These were from my handphone cam.
looking freakingly pale
see, i know they lupp me the many2. hahs.
this one, i like.
sungguhfake.com
very the boncet lah can. hurhur
heh
yours truly
ok now, for the pics in syasya's hp.
pretty? i know.
syasya doesnt want to stop kissing me. =p
i like this one too
stiff sia.
=)
hug2
awak nak kiss?
apeje
pretty picture
boncet again
shake that booty
yours truly,
ChiCka
so anyway, i dreamt of,
Mr Traffic Management Ranger. GOSSH. i dreamt of Shahid. I guess i havent seen him for such a long time then, wahlao, the dream was soooo vivid lah.
crapness..
for the first time, i'm seriously happy to get my period. =)
happy but wrong timing. iyo. =/
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)