hmm

it's a weird feeling.
when the person is in front of you,
all u wanna do is argue.
when he's not there,
you kinda miss him.

oh well, maybe it's just a passing feeling.

dun cancel me out again please.
it's been 2 full months i've not met you.

=)

the day started out bad.

i am generally a very nice person, as u all know.
hahaha. and i'm generally quite patient as well.
but this morning, i was not in my usual self.
maybe, was still having the feeling from the night before.

then that Filipino lady at the Harbourfront Counter,
she refused to let me in,
just because the list of names for Transport wasn't there.

i was like,
"i'm running late for work.."

and she said,
"i understand.. (blah3..)"

and i said,
"i can show u my nametag if u want.."

and she said,
"i understand.. (blah3..) it's not about proving whether u work inside or not.."

and i was like,
"wth laaah. if it's not about proving whether u work inside or not, what's the point of the whole pass and signature system.."

MEREPEK larh.

its not as if u get commission for each person who pays.
and please lah, it's 3 bloody dollars.
i can freaking pay lah.
its not as if it's 300 bucks or what.

thats the problem with newbies.
they follow the rules too much.
they wanna show the whole world that they're working.
without realising that they're actually troubling us, the senior staffs.
and, they're making themselves least-liked and
they will be chopped as "menyusahkan"

the crowd today was, unexpected.
there wasnt much crowd in the morning.
but past noon, tsktsk. the crowd came in.
horrible.

the weather wasnt helping much.
it did initially and then, it was superfreaking hot.

oh so, okay la, ended work at 7 den tumpang Cik Ghazali back to Bkt Batok.
As usual, it's always me and Cik Mashud.
den took train to Lakeside,
and, aku punye pemalas, instead of walking back home,
i waited for 335.

tsktsk.

and den reached home like quite early uh around 8pm.
and nobody's at home coz they went to arwah Mak Long's kenduri tahlil.
i was hungry, but i didnt wanna eat the food at home.

and at that time, i was chatting with my Tagged friend, Asri.
he lives like quite nearby my house lah.
at first, felt like going to Teh Tarik.
den macam malas.

and then, i got bored at home.
the brother hasn't been home for like 2 days already.
and i was bored.
so, ok lah... hahaha.
went out to meet Asri.

lepak2.. talk2.. laugh2..
sekali.... saw that makcik kepo!
she's like the Mami Jarum of Jrg West lah kan.
i was like, looking down lah.

it's not that i'm scared that she's gonna tell my mom that i'm out with a guy mlm2.
more to the fact that, i don't wanna embarass my mom lah.
who knows, MAMI JARUM STRIKES! haha.
oh well, if she wanna say anything about me,
she's gotta think of her pregnant daughter..

"takmo dok nak mengato orang ajo.. diri sendiri cermin dulu"

but then again kan..
i had fun lepak2 with Asri. =)
he's like the first ever Tagged guy i've met lah.
he's cool.

and luckily he sent me back home.
coz there was like a grp of mats, a grp of banglas along the way.
at first i was quite reluctant to let him send me home,
coz his house was like, nearby to the place that we lepak.
and then, i was quite grateful that he did.

so that ended my day.
this rare unboring night has managed to keep a smile on my face for a while.
haha. and i am feeling very very sleepy.

oh and Khai has came back from Indonesia/Australia.
kau ade bwk balek present utk aku tak? hahaha.
HEE.

okok. i really need sleep.
gd nite.

when are things ever gonna be easy?
but if they're easy..
then, we won't be living in this thing called life.

feeling, lonesome

come Monday, 27th October,
it will be my 11th months being single.

how unbelievable is that?
the last time i've been single for long was in secondary school, i think.

and recently,
i've been drowning myself with chick flicks and romance movies.
and i keep going "awwee, that's so sweet." in each of em.

i just don't know what's up with me.
maybe it's one of those lonesome days.
maybe it's just one of the days which i miss abg arman too much.

or maybe..
i just need a hug badly :(

haiz, i can't be thinking about this.
i shouldn't.
i should focus on my career.
i should focus on making money.
and then, save up to go for private diploma.
or maybe save up to take up class 3.

relationships can wait.
some of my aunts have been asking.

"Rin, bile kau nak kahwen?"

mak aih.
stopitseh.
mataer pun takde nak kahwen aper.

and i always have this kinda reaction.
"aaaargh nanti la."
"aaaaaah malas aaah nak fikir"

hahaha.
can u like imagine, if this was the reaction of a 20 year old,
i wonder how Abang Arman would react for a 34 year old.

i wish he can always be around.
haiz.

crazy week

i've been meaning to blog these days.

but it's just that i'm so hooked on to my exhaustion that i passed the thought.
so many things happened in the span of 5 days.

work hasn't been easy.
but i'm surviving.
and i was lucky that the customers i had were understanding and nice.
but i can't be hoping for that all the time.
and i make silly mistakes over the counter.

its okay, like one of the ACSM (Asst Customer Service Manager) Jessie said,

"it's okay, try to make all the mistakes when you're new, because when u get older, u can't afford to make anymore mistakes."

ya, true. still, i'm trying to avoid making any lar.

last night was the worse.
i know i mentioned to Atie on Wednesday night
that i was able to go for Reflections training on Thursday night.
But i didn't turn up.

Supossedly, work ended at 5.30
But i spent 1.5 hrs doing closing because there were shortages and excesses here and there.
luckily, there was Conan, my next counter colleague who helped me loads.
he's a mixed of Chinese and Spanish. haha. nice eyes. =)

so anyway,
haha. he helped me all thru and balanced all the stuff with me.
except that i had $10 excess which i had no idea where it came from.
so just declare lar.

by the time i saw it was 6.30pm,
i texted Kak Diana and went back with her.
along the way, mom called.

and she said,

"Nak gi melawat. Mak Long meninggal."

it was like.. shocking.
Saw her doing fine a few weeks ago.
haiz, Allah s.w.t loves her more than us.

Although i wasn't very close to her, i felt sad coz, she's my aunt anyway.

today, went to kebumikan,
i cried a lot, i have never seen this kinda things before.
haiz.. and after that after kenduri tahlil also,
while my dad was talking to the rest of their family,
i cried coz it was sad to see adults acting like that.

and, i finally saw my long lost nephew, Sairy.
he has been in and out from juvenile prison, and jail,
eversince 14?
and finally get to see him.
we're of the same age lah. and i kinda miss him.
but, haha. just now, we never really talk
and i dunno whether he still recognise me.
plus, he's engaged.

ahh anyways...

was actually supposed to go to JB with abang Arman today.
but, he didnt update me anything, which he said he will.
alah, but then again, this kinda things always happen coz,
he'll always sleep it away.
it's fine.
=)

and now, i'm having a bad headache.
and feeling weak.
urggghh.

thats it lah.

bahhh

as much i want to type in a loooot of outstanding thoughts (stop it siar with "outstanding"),
i guess, i'm just too tired to actually type it out.

hmm, i miss blogging so much.

and i miss being able to type down what i think.
argh.
so, long weekend for me.

friday, saturday, sunday and monday off.
wooohoo.
but sunday gotto work at sentosa.

alah, i guess maybe tmr jer lar update proper.
huhu

tsktsks

i know i'm supposed to do more studying tonight.
but, i really need a timeout.
my head feels like it's about to explode,
my eyes feel like they want to pop out any minute.

i just read Ain's blog.
and i really admire her positivity.
how i wish i can get half of that positivity in me.

i'm just not confident about anything right now.
it's time i stop and think that my life,
is not to be a role model anymore.

i have flaws too.
i can't be strong all the time.
i can't be confident all the time.
i can't be everyone's life machine.

haiz, i'm still figuring out, where my life will be heading towards.

haiz, bloody scared about tmr.

URGH!

I aM FReAkingLY StrEssED!!!

thoughts.

i am actually supposed to study for the hands on test this saturday.
but i just havent got the momentum to study.
and i can't possibly keep procrastinating.
it kills. procrastinating i mean.

i just have to keep in mind.
that i am a growing adult.
and that life is not just about having fun anymore.
life, is not just about waiting when's the next term break.
life, is not about making silly mistakes.
coz, face it.
this is the transition.

i guess i need to reevaluate my life again.
for that i need to do some soul searching.

oh well, till next time.

perfume mania

SATURDAY NIGHT!

now i know what it means by TGIF.
yes i know it means Thank God It's Friday
but more to like, the feeling of TGIF.

it's tiring to work office hours.
but then again, it's quite enjoyable.

today, worked at Sentosa.
it was really tiring and my back ache was being a bitch again.

okay well, i'm not here to complain about work.

but then, i just feel like talking about my speding habits.
yesterday night i went to meet Atie after work at Far East.
and i was like reluctant to spend a single cent there.
instead, i chose to go to Lucky Plaza,
coz ada Song & Song mah.

i have been sucha cheapo recently.

but then,
when we entered Lucky Plaza my eyes fell for the perfume shop.
and as u all know, i am a sucker for perfumes.
so then, i bought another perfume again,
which makes a total of 3 full perfumes at home.

first it was this,

Adidas Fruity Rhythm.
surprisingly, i still have 3/4 of it left.

then i bought this,



Body Shop White Musk Perfume Oil.
and it costed me a bomb.
used it for Income the 5 days.

and now, this perfume got me and my mum hooked.
i bought it coz it reminds me of Ain. Ain Endang larh not Ain Harapan. haha.





Victoria Secrets' Forever Romance Body Splash.

but now, i feel like buying another VS Body Splash.
coz this one gave me the headache at work just now.

lol. u see.
i find clothes expensive when they reach $20+.
but i dun mind spending $38.90 for a mini bottle of perfume.
tsktsk

oh anyway,
i have been smiling hard today.
the man popped up again. =)

"hey you. when's the next time u werk at sentosa? or u stop werking there already?
"i'm still here once a week. maybe next sunday. what's up?"
"wanna drop by and see what's new on the island - and of course, meet my dreamgirl."

tell me, how can i not smile foolishly at such things?

i've missed you too much, love

temporary hiatus.

in the event where the owner of this blog has gotten better and is less busy,
only then she will update her blog.

she is suffering from a severe back injury,
which is hindering her movement.

and, she has to juggle 3 jobs at the moment.
so, she needs all the time for her replenish her energy.

and i dunno how she's going to survive.

so, yeap.
see ya when i see ya. =)

Raya

well, Hari Raya has been good i guess.
nothing much to update about.
just pictures i guess.

1st day.




2nd day



3rd day



so then the night of the 3rd day,
the family and i decided to do some final touches to the house.
and surprisingly, i think we outdone ourselves.

the balcony



and my favourite thing in the house.



and i did my room like again.
that's the "study" table.



the perfume bottle collection.



yeah. so today's the open house.
=)

30Sept

Yayyay! Hari Raya!

ok besides that point,
i've had a freaking long day today.
my mom woke me up at like 8.30am.
coz the parents wanted to go to Geylang.

grrrrr!

so then, picked the brother up from school and went to Geylang.
saw that ITE silat guy coz he attended to my mom.
so then, shopped and got these.



don't ask why they're both blue.
argh.

then went back to Jurong and sent Aken to school.
went to CK to buy my Adidas Fruity Rhythm.
and.. they changed the bottle again.

presenting.. THE LATEST BABY.



which adds to the collection.





at night, went to kenduri at the aunt's place.
it feels weird coz, my maternal side hasnt been contacting us eversince we got back from Indonesia.
The only ones in contact was my aunt and my ranger uncle.
howells.




but i guess, even tho my grandma refuses to talk to my mom,
i'm just glad we came coz finally, i met my babies again.






yeah, guess that's all then.

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