Feeling queasy

It hasnt been a good day today.

Woke up late (it's a F1 weekend), took before food medicine and an hour later I took Anlene Vanilla. About half an hour later, i vomitted. I don't know why i felt so nauseus.

Just now at about 4.30, when I was about to cook, I vomitted again.

I don't know whats wrong. Is it something I ate yesterday? Or the fact that I didnt eat last night? Or is it the Anlene? I don't know.

My tummy's feeling a little funny too. I didn't eat much for lunch as well.

Need to find the medicine for nausea later after i eat. :(

Blessed

Listening to: Charlie Puth - One Call Away

Lovely weather. It's been dark since 3pm and it finally rained. It's so dark that it's like 7pm already.

It's my Hafiz's first day of work today! Alhamdulillah.. Allah has answered our prayers. I really hope that he can stay long with this company. I don't think I can go through another round of job searching and interviews anymore.

I feel like a housewife sia. Husband go out to work, wife stay at home. Been so long since. Glad I managed to go back to sleep at 10 am after the husband went to work.

Okay, on a more serious note,

I really feel that I have a trauma of being in the hospitalised. I've dreamt about it a few times and even cried in my sleep. Speaking of dreams, today I dreamt about experiencing earthquake and I couldn't find Aken. Hafiz was telling me he dreamt that he kena fired from work! What's with all these dreams.

Aiyah, I usually have a lot of things I want to blog about. Then when I sit down to actually blog, I forget everything. Next time I'll jot it down la.

Time to lose those belly fats

My husband is getting more and more paranoid that he is getting heavier. He is also complaining that his belly is getting bigger too.

After watching an episode of Hello Counselor the other day, about a daughter, worried that her father is constantly eating and when Lee Young Ja was asking if it was difficult to breathe, it kinda struck me too. I am having difficulty breathing these days. I think partly because of my own tummy and heavy chest.

So, I thought, okay, let's do this together.

First, I found out that we should not drink so much sweet drinks.
YES. Ever since we moved in here, we have been buying packet/can drinks constantly. That has got to stop.

I think I will go for the SOS + Low Carb diet.

Salt - Oil - Sugar , Less Rice

Reduce all that first. I'm not particularly worried about the Salt & Oil part if I'm cooking at home. However, we need to control ourselves when we eat out. I need to get healthier substitutes for certain ingredients as well.

For instance, I tried the Ayam Brand Coconut Milk. It's lighter than Kara. BUT! There is also the Trim Coconut Milk!

YAY! Sorry husband, I'm going to switch to this from now on.

I'm sticking to Canola Oil after my Sunflower Oil finish.

Okay lah. Let's just take it slow and see where it goes.

Unspoken Thoughts

It's day 125? I lost track.

So far, Alhamdulillah I have been able to do many things as I usually do. Just that I get tired once in a while. But today, after a long while, I felt sick again. I ate something wrong and my tummy ached so bad and had diarrhoea. Managed to drink cinnamon tea to reduce the ache.

Anyway, recently, I have been thinking about kids. Seeing how some of my friends are having 2 children already. I used to be upset that I wasn't able to get pregnant during the first year of our marriage. Now, going through all these, makes me think otherwise.

Not that I don't want to have children. Firstly, I am afraid that my genes will affect my child and I really hope that my child will never have to go through what I have gone through. But with that being said, IF, Allah wills it and I have a child, I will gladly accept. The doctors were saying that I may not be able to get pregnant but I believe in Allah and His plans. Whether I get pregnant or not, I will leave it to Allah.

Secondly, I am grateful to my husband even if I don't usually say it most of the time. No matter how difficult I was, he has always stuck by my side. He has been my main caregiver but it has been really challenging now that he wants to go back to the work industry again. He has gone for a lot of interviews but we can't fathom why none really caught on.

People who don't understand our situation can say a lot of things about why my husband is unemployed when we need money for medical costs and our sustenance. People don't know that he tries. It's frustrating sometimes. For me, it's important that I support him in what he wants to do. Of course sometimes I get irritated that he doesn't want some jobs but in all fairness, happiness in what you do is important as well. What's the point of working but you're not happy with your job? It'll be suffocating.

So, yes, we will try again and practice for more interviews.

I think I have some more thoughts but I'm getting a headache. HAHA. Till next time.