feeling, lonesome

come Monday, 27th October,
it will be my 11th months being single.

how unbelievable is that?
the last time i've been single for long was in secondary school, i think.

and recently,
i've been drowning myself with chick flicks and romance movies.
and i keep going "awwee, that's so sweet." in each of em.

i just don't know what's up with me.
maybe it's one of those lonesome days.
maybe it's just one of the days which i miss abg arman too much.

or maybe..
i just need a hug badly :(

haiz, i can't be thinking about this.
i shouldn't.
i should focus on my career.
i should focus on making money.
and then, save up to go for private diploma.
or maybe save up to take up class 3.

relationships can wait.
some of my aunts have been asking.

"Rin, bile kau nak kahwen?"

mak aih.
stopitseh.
mataer pun takde nak kahwen aper.

and i always have this kinda reaction.
"aaaargh nanti la."
"aaaaaah malas aaah nak fikir"

hahaha.
can u like imagine, if this was the reaction of a 20 year old,
i wonder how Abang Arman would react for a 34 year old.

i wish he can always be around.
haiz.