tummy cramps, i hate very badly.
it hurts damn bad lah ok from yesterday.
fuckfuckfuck.
pms. that explains it.
the cramps, the bad mood swings, the unwanted feeling and the perut boncet.
i am feeling unwanted.
not needed.
and alone.
i feel like crying.
but i shouldn't coz crying makes me look weak.
but i just can't stand the feeling.
i need you badly.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
sueyest day
yesterday was a total disaster.
yesterday was the Run For Hope event at Sentosa and me and Ahmad were stationed at the office. So bof of us were chit-chatting with Ikhwan when i smelt something wrong. We ran out of the office and saw a Black Hyundai Matrix with a smoky bonnet.
Ahmadon told me to open the bonnet. I was like, 'KAU GILER PE?! Panas lah!'
and i ran back to the office to take the duty phone. And me and Ahmadon saw the ranger's van. Ingatkan dah sampai wifout even having to call them up lah kan.. They didnt see the smoke (which was effing thick) and just drove past.
So i tried to call the ranger. But the reception was being a bitch. Went back to the office. tried to call but keep having this unavailable number tone. It was then that i realise, its 62791155 instead of 62751166 which ive been dialling.
at the same time, Ahmadon was fighting the fire wif a few others. I ran out of the carpark office and hoping to help them, i ran to the next fire extinguisher case.
and i smashed it wif my hand, then i kicked. But then, it was too late. My hand was bleeding and my wrist was slashed badly till can see the isi.
i was bleeding effing badly lah.
then abang azlan, the ranger, tried to help. but they said, Ahmadon's hands were bleeding too so he did Ahmadon first.
They said that i needed medical attention badly and wanted to send me to the First Aid point at Palawan. But Raj ( my manager) wanted me to be sent to SGH and can clain under Sentosa. So then, Mani sent me to the hospital.
And, they said i needed to be stitched.
8 stitched all in all. And i cried like mad while the doctor was stitching me up. When i got out from the operation room, i guess i kinda like scared Ahmadon a bit coz he needed to be stitched as well. but then tak jadi and they glued him up.
went back to sentosa to get my stuff.. Raj spoked to me and went back.
slept.
check out Ahmadon's blog about it. kelakar pulak bace2 balek.
at night, went to watch CDM'S show kat Kampong Melayu. Started damn late lah. and i saw 2 of my ex-boyfriend there. And i saw the bitch there. dunno whether she recognised me or not. GEEEEZ.
and when i reached, i asked zoul.. "mane dia (as in the boyfriend)?"
and zoul was like...
"REEEEEEEEEEEEEL! BINI KAU DATANG NI HAAAA! REEEEEEL! BINI KAU OIII!"
ye lah. like thanks eh Zoul. betol nye awok eh?
kuat giler lah kan. coz not many of the cucus noe that i'm wif him wad. last nite was the first cucu show that i watched. then paiseh giler ah.. kimex. then like, some of the girlfriends of the cucus were there la.. I only know Emylia. geeee.
ok well. thats done.
i've got some pichas to update, ripped mostly from Almi's blog. hahah..
MCG COMMITEE AY 06/07
Endang at Taman Warisan Show
Endang's Chalet
cute kaaaan? hahha..
Physical training
the adik ipar. =p
okeh thats all.
yesterday was the Run For Hope event at Sentosa and me and Ahmad were stationed at the office. So bof of us were chit-chatting with Ikhwan when i smelt something wrong. We ran out of the office and saw a Black Hyundai Matrix with a smoky bonnet.
Ahmadon told me to open the bonnet. I was like, 'KAU GILER PE?! Panas lah!'
and i ran back to the office to take the duty phone. And me and Ahmadon saw the ranger's van. Ingatkan dah sampai wifout even having to call them up lah kan.. They didnt see the smoke (which was effing thick) and just drove past.
So i tried to call the ranger. But the reception was being a bitch. Went back to the office. tried to call but keep having this unavailable number tone. It was then that i realise, its 62791155 instead of 62751166 which ive been dialling.
at the same time, Ahmadon was fighting the fire wif a few others. I ran out of the carpark office and hoping to help them, i ran to the next fire extinguisher case.
and i smashed it wif my hand, then i kicked. But then, it was too late. My hand was bleeding and my wrist was slashed badly till can see the isi.
i was bleeding effing badly lah.
then abang azlan, the ranger, tried to help. but they said, Ahmadon's hands were bleeding too so he did Ahmadon first.
They said that i needed medical attention badly and wanted to send me to the First Aid point at Palawan. But Raj ( my manager) wanted me to be sent to SGH and can clain under Sentosa. So then, Mani sent me to the hospital.
And, they said i needed to be stitched.
8 stitched all in all. And i cried like mad while the doctor was stitching me up. When i got out from the operation room, i guess i kinda like scared Ahmadon a bit coz he needed to be stitched as well. but then tak jadi and they glued him up.
went back to sentosa to get my stuff.. Raj spoked to me and went back.
slept.
check out Ahmadon's blog about it. kelakar pulak bace2 balek.
at night, went to watch CDM'S show kat Kampong Melayu. Started damn late lah. and i saw 2 of my ex-boyfriend there. And i saw the bitch there. dunno whether she recognised me or not. GEEEEZ.
and when i reached, i asked zoul.. "mane dia (as in the boyfriend)?"
and zoul was like...
"REEEEEEEEEEEEEL! BINI KAU DATANG NI HAAAA! REEEEEEL! BINI KAU OIII!"
ye lah. like thanks eh Zoul. betol nye awok eh?
kuat giler lah kan. coz not many of the cucus noe that i'm wif him wad. last nite was the first cucu show that i watched. then paiseh giler ah.. kimex. then like, some of the girlfriends of the cucus were there la.. I only know Emylia. geeee.
ok well. thats done.
i've got some pichas to update, ripped mostly from Almi's blog. hahah..
MCG COMMITEE AY 06/07
Endang at Taman Warisan Show
Endang's Chalet
cute kaaaan? hahha..
Physical training
the adik ipar. =p
okeh thats all.
Friday, September 14, 2007
when everything falls together
i've always thought to myself. who is this girl that they kept talking about?
Ana sini Ana sana.
i know that she's the boyfriend's ex-girlfriend whom he really hates. and she was with his friend when she accepted him. and they of course, gave her her bit of medicine and dumped her. And they found out that she was going out with one of their friends. Sampaikan nak tunang but tak jadi. and now, she's going out with another friend of the 3.
kirekan aper? pompan rolling among the group aper?
so i was online at Anak Melayu just now and went to the boyfriend's profile and i saw this girl named Ana, who i know from last time, which, i will tell later.
and i did some researching.. googled for her blog. and read her blog. and she said she and this girl (the bf's friend's gf) are cousins. and she said she went for their dk shows and lepak with them.
and i'm like.... WTF!!!!! ITS HER.
how can i not notice it before when he told me?
Ana.
The bitch who took away Jumali from me. The bitch who STOLE Jumali away from me.
in case those of you don't know.
Jumali is my ex-boyfriend. I was with him for 5 months plus until i was superbusy and had no time for him and one day, i came back home to my blog, and there was a tag.
minahite:
hw could u let jumali suffer all alone seh?? u expect him to be by urside but where were u when he need u?? dia sad im e one who cheer him up seh. u dun msg or kol cause u too BZ! u dun even think abt his feelings seh. u deserve it girl. u give him more pain den happiness
that was the start of it. she took my life away.
did u fucking know how crazy it made me?! did u know how many sleepless nights i had?! i cried everynight coz she took away the guy i loved (then). How i nearly killed myself?!
and, i thought, since Jumali loved her, then, i shall give him to her with an open heart and i told her to take good care of him.
AND WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE DO?
She dumped him 2 weeks later!
fucking bitch.
screw her!!!
fine. i just hope i dont see her around. if i do, there'll be a side of me which ppl would have never seen before will show.
hah.. the wonders of internet..
boyfie2.. i love u wif all my heart and i'll never doubt you again sweetie and will never vent my anger on you again. i love you.
Ana sini Ana sana.
i know that she's the boyfriend's ex-girlfriend whom he really hates. and she was with his friend when she accepted him. and they of course, gave her her bit of medicine and dumped her. And they found out that she was going out with one of their friends. Sampaikan nak tunang but tak jadi. and now, she's going out with another friend of the 3.
kirekan aper? pompan rolling among the group aper?
so i was online at Anak Melayu just now and went to the boyfriend's profile and i saw this girl named Ana, who i know from last time, which, i will tell later.
and i did some researching.. googled for her blog. and read her blog. and she said she and this girl (the bf's friend's gf) are cousins. and she said she went for their dk shows and lepak with them.
and i'm like.... WTF!!!!! ITS HER.
how can i not notice it before when he told me?
Ana.
The bitch who took away Jumali from me. The bitch who STOLE Jumali away from me.
in case those of you don't know.
Jumali is my ex-boyfriend. I was with him for 5 months plus until i was superbusy and had no time for him and one day, i came back home to my blog, and there was a tag.
minahite:
hw could u let jumali suffer all alone seh?? u expect him to be by urside but where were u when he need u?? dia sad im e one who cheer him up seh. u dun msg or kol cause u too BZ! u dun even think abt his feelings seh. u deserve it girl. u give him more pain den happiness
that was the start of it. she took my life away.
did u fucking know how crazy it made me?! did u know how many sleepless nights i had?! i cried everynight coz she took away the guy i loved (then). How i nearly killed myself?!
and, i thought, since Jumali loved her, then, i shall give him to her with an open heart and i told her to take good care of him.
AND WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE DO?
She dumped him 2 weeks later!
fucking bitch.
screw her!!!
fine. i just hope i dont see her around. if i do, there'll be a side of me which ppl would have never seen before will show.
hah.. the wonders of internet..
boyfie2.. i love u wif all my heart and i'll never doubt you again sweetie and will never vent my anger on you again. i love you.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
buses and trains
HAPPY 1 MONTH TO US.
and of all days, it's the 1st day of puase also. hahaha. what derr.
and yes, atie.. i've been blogging at mac. hahaha... at least there's somewhere which i can get access to the net to. and it kinda feels weird that i'm at mac when its a fasting day. huhu..
oh you know, just random i guess.. i think singaporeans are just getting richer and richer. roads are practically jammed up everywhere. i was just reading the newspaper the other day, and they're like increasing the bus fares. no wonder people are getting cars nowadays, it's practically cheaper than taking public transport.
i used to think why the boyfriend likes taking buses coz i prefered taking trains and that's because i have train concession. but when i didnt have train concession coz the parents refuse to put in the money, then i understood why the boyfriend prefered bus to train.
coz trains practically eat up all ur money.
to work:
1 bus ride to Lakeside $0.65
1 train ride to Harbourfront can coz me like, $1.54.
compared to:
1 bus ride to Jurong East Interchange $0.65
1 bus ride to Harbourfront $1.38
to school:
1 bus ride to Lakeside $0.65
1 train ride to Woodlands $1.40??
1 bus ride to Woodlands Interchange $1.38
see the difference.
i'm gonna stick with bus from now on. and trains, once in a while, thankyou.
and of all days, it's the 1st day of puase also. hahaha. what derr.
and yes, atie.. i've been blogging at mac. hahaha... at least there's somewhere which i can get access to the net to. and it kinda feels weird that i'm at mac when its a fasting day. huhu..
oh you know, just random i guess.. i think singaporeans are just getting richer and richer. roads are practically jammed up everywhere. i was just reading the newspaper the other day, and they're like increasing the bus fares. no wonder people are getting cars nowadays, it's practically cheaper than taking public transport.
i used to think why the boyfriend likes taking buses coz i prefered taking trains and that's because i have train concession. but when i didnt have train concession coz the parents refuse to put in the money, then i understood why the boyfriend prefered bus to train.
coz trains practically eat up all ur money.
to work:
1 bus ride to Lakeside $0.65
1 train ride to Harbourfront can coz me like, $1.54.
compared to:
1 bus ride to Jurong East Interchange $0.65
1 bus ride to Harbourfront $1.38
to school:
1 bus ride to Lakeside $0.65
1 train ride to Woodlands $1.40??
1 bus ride to Woodlands Interchange $1.38
see the difference.
i'm gonna stick with bus from now on. and trains, once in a while, thankyou.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
i love the boyfriend.
I feel bad coz i blew up at him again yesterday. My emotional bouts are coming back again but it should be no excuse for me to vent it on him.
It's already good enuff that he's going out with me and spending time with me but what else do i expect of him? He gives me so much attention and pampers me more than any of the ex. But why the heck am i being selfish? Thinking of only myself, as always, and not think about what he feels. He's always the one who's always giving in when i sulk or when i blow up. And still, that didnt seem as enough for me.
i just don't know why i reacted that way.
siggh.
i'm going back to school. not quiting. that should be good i guess, and i hope, this time, i'll focus on school instead of anything else which i shouldnt actually be focusing on. i've left my Endangs in good hands, so now i know i shouldnt worry or stress myself so much. just that i have to take care of Endang at ATP.
Ouhhh geee Mac is gonna close in 20 mins.
okok.. i love my boyfriend many2.
cinta itu boleh diumpamakan macam makan sambal belacan.
walau pedas hingga mengalir air mata tapi dimakan juaa..
laalalalaaa~
It's already good enuff that he's going out with me and spending time with me but what else do i expect of him? He gives me so much attention and pampers me more than any of the ex. But why the heck am i being selfish? Thinking of only myself, as always, and not think about what he feels. He's always the one who's always giving in when i sulk or when i blow up. And still, that didnt seem as enough for me.
i just don't know why i reacted that way.
siggh.
i'm going back to school. not quiting. that should be good i guess, and i hope, this time, i'll focus on school instead of anything else which i shouldnt actually be focusing on. i've left my Endangs in good hands, so now i know i shouldnt worry or stress myself so much. just that i have to take care of Endang at ATP.
Ouhhh geee Mac is gonna close in 20 mins.
okok.. i love my boyfriend many2.
cinta itu boleh diumpamakan macam makan sambal belacan.
walau pedas hingga mengalir air mata tapi dimakan juaa..
laalalalaaa~
Saturday, September 01, 2007
loves
ABANG KHAI TEGURED ME LAAAAAHH CAN!!!
happy giler lah seh.. ahha. the whole day i was like going gaga over him, coz i havent seen him for a long time.. and 2ndly, he's DAMN cute okeh! saw him first at Beach Station then at Dolphin.. Then at Beach Station again.
I was going to the toilet lah.. then he was also heading there. Then we kinda like stand beside each other then he said something to me which i didnt really hear lah actually. Then the funny thing is, while i was heading twds the ladies and he twds the gents, this funny jap old lady said she lost her ticket to SOS. Then Abang Khai tak jadi masuk toilet and stood behind me, coz i was talkin to the old lady. We were like trying to guess what she was trying to say, until, i figured out.
"my ticket arrr go inside-eh.. how to get it out?"
SHE MEANT:
I FLUSHED DOWN MY TICKET AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET IT OUT?!
like wtf! haha.. me and Abang Khai were like: ..........
giler lah... and then, also, when we were walking off, he imitated the old lady's walk and it was like so funny lah.. ahaha.. mcm orang utan okeh.. ahaha..
and den, back to beach carpark.
nari dpt cuci mata.. khekhekhe.. but, haiiz..
i miss my sayang badly okayyy. work everyday till late, i don't get to call him. i rarely msg him. sad lah eh.. the last time we met was during the FD. which was like, 3 days ago. then i can only meet him again on Monday.
Tmr's his bday. ohh yessss!
HAPPY ADVANCED 23RD BIRTHDAY SAYANG! I LOVE YOU KOOCHIE MUNCHIES OKAY.
it hasnt been easy for us. from the very start. 5 months ago.. the beginning of everything. u closed it and u opened it again for me. there hasnt been anyone else except for you. i love you dearest. will always love you.
muchlove,
ChiCka
happy giler lah seh.. ahha. the whole day i was like going gaga over him, coz i havent seen him for a long time.. and 2ndly, he's DAMN cute okeh! saw him first at Beach Station then at Dolphin.. Then at Beach Station again.
I was going to the toilet lah.. then he was also heading there. Then we kinda like stand beside each other then he said something to me which i didnt really hear lah actually. Then the funny thing is, while i was heading twds the ladies and he twds the gents, this funny jap old lady said she lost her ticket to SOS. Then Abang Khai tak jadi masuk toilet and stood behind me, coz i was talkin to the old lady. We were like trying to guess what she was trying to say, until, i figured out.
"my ticket arrr go inside-eh.. how to get it out?"
SHE MEANT:
I FLUSHED DOWN MY TICKET AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET IT OUT?!
like wtf! haha.. me and Abang Khai were like: ..........
giler lah... and then, also, when we were walking off, he imitated the old lady's walk and it was like so funny lah.. ahaha.. mcm orang utan okeh.. ahaha..
and den, back to beach carpark.
nari dpt cuci mata.. khekhekhe.. but, haiiz..
i miss my sayang badly okayyy. work everyday till late, i don't get to call him. i rarely msg him. sad lah eh.. the last time we met was during the FD. which was like, 3 days ago. then i can only meet him again on Monday.
Tmr's his bday. ohh yessss!
HAPPY ADVANCED 23RD BIRTHDAY SAYANG! I LOVE YOU KOOCHIE MUNCHIES OKAY.
it hasnt been easy for us. from the very start. 5 months ago.. the beginning of everything. u closed it and u opened it again for me. there hasnt been anyone else except for you. i love you dearest. will always love you.
muchlove,
ChiCka
Thursday, August 30, 2007
updates
my dear friend kartel said to me today at work:
"kau mcm tk update jer blog kau.."
hehehh.. been effing busy lah to update ah. like totally lah.
last Monday had chalet with my Endangs and the guys as well.. kekek lah eh.. ahaha.. it went on fine lah can.. then at night, when all of us wanted to sleep.. this particular person just wont shut up. oh, he wasnt really invited lah actually. peh irritating. me, hairil and zoul and nafis were so fucking pissed off lah.. cheebay.. kite dah sedap2 tdo dulu den dier bising.. geez.
but overall, if we minus that part off, the chalet was great lah.. hairil kena butter on his face. ahaha.. his parents came over. gee... i so do not want to rmb that part. paiseh gilerbabz okeh..
uhmm.. then the next day, 'woke' up at 730 am.. luckily i showered first, if not, have to quarrel with 14 over ppl for shower. haha.. then, siap2 and checked out.. had breakfast at Afghanistan at Tamp, den head home.
ahaha.. then in the train, the same irritating guy followed us and sat beside Nafis.. Nafis bo layan ah when he's listening to his mp3.. then Nafis wore his hood and sat leant in front. The irritating guy wore his hood and leant in front too. Then Nafis took off his hood and leant back. the irritating guy, too, took off his hood and leant back.
i was laughing like heck la.. den i msg Nafis.. "Blood brother baru or wad.." then he was like.."FUCKKK. COPYRIGHT SEHHHK"
hahaha.. blardy hell.
then went reached jrg east, waitd for mum, and went to JB. slept at 9pm that day.
and... the next day.. ade MCG Family Day. Was supposed to meet Esah, Ain, Jay and Atie at Jrg East at 830am. But i woke up at 9.30 am lah.. ahhaha. .. den siap2.. then i was like, fuck lah.. i have no idea how to go to East Coast Park. hahaha. then called him up to accompany me. haha.. we left there around 5 plus lah.. coz i was still shagged from the chalet.. then went to Bedok and waited for the parents to fetch.
and now, i'm at work. new duties. beach carpark eh.. office job or whaaaad. hurhur... tkpelah.. ok lah tu eh. geez..
i'm done updating.. =)
"kau mcm tk update jer blog kau.."
hehehh.. been effing busy lah to update ah. like totally lah.
last Monday had chalet with my Endangs and the guys as well.. kekek lah eh.. ahaha.. it went on fine lah can.. then at night, when all of us wanted to sleep.. this particular person just wont shut up. oh, he wasnt really invited lah actually. peh irritating. me, hairil and zoul and nafis were so fucking pissed off lah.. cheebay.. kite dah sedap2 tdo dulu den dier bising.. geez.
but overall, if we minus that part off, the chalet was great lah.. hairil kena butter on his face. ahaha.. his parents came over. gee... i so do not want to rmb that part. paiseh gilerbabz okeh..
uhmm.. then the next day, 'woke' up at 730 am.. luckily i showered first, if not, have to quarrel with 14 over ppl for shower. haha.. then, siap2 and checked out.. had breakfast at Afghanistan at Tamp, den head home.
ahaha.. then in the train, the same irritating guy followed us and sat beside Nafis.. Nafis bo layan ah when he's listening to his mp3.. then Nafis wore his hood and sat leant in front. The irritating guy wore his hood and leant in front too. Then Nafis took off his hood and leant back. the irritating guy, too, took off his hood and leant back.
i was laughing like heck la.. den i msg Nafis.. "Blood brother baru or wad.." then he was like.."FUCKKK. COPYRIGHT SEHHHK"
hahaha.. blardy hell.
then went reached jrg east, waitd for mum, and went to JB. slept at 9pm that day.
and... the next day.. ade MCG Family Day. Was supposed to meet Esah, Ain, Jay and Atie at Jrg East at 830am. But i woke up at 9.30 am lah.. ahhaha. .. den siap2.. then i was like, fuck lah.. i have no idea how to go to East Coast Park. hahaha. then called him up to accompany me. haha.. we left there around 5 plus lah.. coz i was still shagged from the chalet.. then went to Bedok and waited for the parents to fetch.
and now, i'm at work. new duties. beach carpark eh.. office job or whaaaad. hurhur... tkpelah.. ok lah tu eh. geez..
i'm done updating.. =)
Monday, August 20, 2007
reply to tags
ifah: aku pun ko tk link...:
==> okeh.. ku dah link! =))
Fadhil: hihi.. how are ye?
==> uhmm okay lah.. fadhil maner eh ni?
Ain: Dee! Harap cepat sembuh yer! Takmu overwork.. Nanti semua org risau.. Ehem pon risau.. hehe!
==> lol~ dun worry. i'll be fine.. ahaha.. ehemm eh? LOL.
huda: yessaa.. aku pon miss dk sey.. biler nie dee next training.tk sabar nk main rebana nie? hehe.. miss ya..
==> wahh mummy dengan semangat nye lah seh nak main rebana.. wakkaka..
lee: i really really really seriously sincerely miss DIKIR LA.
==> i miss dikir too. this wed okeh??
jaJa: tK link sEy... haha;p
==> okeh dah link.. =))
kartel: wad's happenin there dian?
==> i'll tell u when u come back from indon~
lee: lol. missing u & endang like MAD LA. no dikir after skool makes us feel so incomplete & tergapai-gapai. sadsadsad. WEN NIE DIKIR ?
==> ahhaa.. yeah lor.. i miss all u so much lah can.. haiiz. takpe.. dis wed got mini trg. hehh~
last friday, went to watch rush hour 3 with dearest. heh.. was super funny lah can.. thumbs up for the show. then went to school to meet the girls for our mini meeting session.
and it ended up in tears. i'm glad that we opend up lah. really.. and after that, i guess, we bonded a lot. =)
went to work on saturday. i fainted at work and was hospitalised overnight at sgh. haiiz.. they said that i've fits. oh great... just what i needed. urghhh. another illness.
ok well, till next time.
==> okeh.. ku dah link! =))
Fadhil: hihi.. how are ye?
==> uhmm okay lah.. fadhil maner eh ni?
Ain: Dee! Harap cepat sembuh yer! Takmu overwork.. Nanti semua org risau.. Ehem pon risau.. hehe!
==> lol~ dun worry. i'll be fine.. ahaha.. ehemm eh? LOL.
huda: yessaa.. aku pon miss dk sey.. biler nie dee next training.tk sabar nk main rebana nie? hehe.. miss ya..
==> wahh mummy dengan semangat nye lah seh nak main rebana.. wakkaka..
lee: i really really really seriously sincerely miss DIKIR LA.
==> i miss dikir too. this wed okeh??
jaJa: tK link sEy... haha;p
==> okeh dah link.. =))
kartel: wad's happenin there dian?
==> i'll tell u when u come back from indon~
lee: lol. missing u & endang like MAD LA. no dikir after skool makes us feel so incomplete & tergapai-gapai. sadsadsad. WEN NIE DIKIR ?
==> ahhaa.. yeah lor.. i miss all u so much lah can.. haiiz. takpe.. dis wed got mini trg. hehh~
last friday, went to watch rush hour 3 with dearest. heh.. was super funny lah can.. thumbs up for the show. then went to school to meet the girls for our mini meeting session.
and it ended up in tears. i'm glad that we opend up lah. really.. and after that, i guess, we bonded a lot. =)
went to work on saturday. i fainted at work and was hospitalised overnight at sgh. haiiz.. they said that i've fits. oh great... just what i needed. urghhh. another illness.
ok well, till next time.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
screwd
my life is basically screwed, mind you.
its a decision i have to make. and i've made that decision and i dun wanna regret anything. nth has been officialised yet. i hope it will be soon. my future, my past. i have no idea what i'm gonna do but staying is not an option for me.
i feel so trapped. its not a decision which i'm proud of. but its something which i wanna do badly. been scolded and lectured by lotsa people for my decision. but nth they said changed my mind.
i'm sorry my Endangs for having to leave u girls on your own for Khatulistiwa. But dun worry, i will still be around at ATP.
So, enuff about that.
while some downside stuff happend, my life did go uphill.
after months of waiting, the wait is finally over. Love has come back to me. He's been there emotionally and physically for me. and that, i'm really happy for. i love you sweetness and thanks for everything.
so thats it.
its a decision i have to make. and i've made that decision and i dun wanna regret anything. nth has been officialised yet. i hope it will be soon. my future, my past. i have no idea what i'm gonna do but staying is not an option for me.
i feel so trapped. its not a decision which i'm proud of. but its something which i wanna do badly. been scolded and lectured by lotsa people for my decision. but nth they said changed my mind.
i'm sorry my Endangs for having to leave u girls on your own for Khatulistiwa. But dun worry, i will still be around at ATP.
So, enuff about that.
while some downside stuff happend, my life did go uphill.
after months of waiting, the wait is finally over. Love has come back to me. He's been there emotionally and physically for me. and that, i'm really happy for. i love you sweetness and thanks for everything.
so thats it.
reply to tags.
Shacute: takyah la dikir sorg2.. meh lah join kitorg kat ATP. =)))
lee: thanks baybeh.. but u know what my decision is lah hor. hmm. i love u lah ehhhh. wakaka.
mak esah dongga: alahhai.. bleh menangis lah aku. =(
kholique: okay. linked.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
haiiiz.
so many things i wanna say but too tired and lazy to type down. pichas will do i guess..
okay well, that's that.
yesterday's combined training was effing tough. was pissed with a lot of people. the point is, sometimes, i feel overpowered. the thing is, too, i don't mind if the girls wanna voice up, i welcome them to. but, not till someone don't know their limits and don't respect me as a leader.
secondly, was pissed off with him. asal tukar steps jer nak muke mencengis pasal steps. and i was like fine uhhhh. malas ah nk carik steps. and plus, the girls keep wanting to change steps. korg kene ingat, ini show 2 jam. korg buat steps susah2 buat per. memenatkan diri jer.
haiz.. the whole taman warisan show is just pissing and stressing me off. urggggh.
my fyp evaluation is in 1 1/2 hrs. i am fucking stressed up lah. lama2 aku bleh jadi giler lah seh. ini stress itu stress.
haiiz.
saya sayang awak sgt2.
okay well, that's that.
yesterday's combined training was effing tough. was pissed with a lot of people. the point is, sometimes, i feel overpowered. the thing is, too, i don't mind if the girls wanna voice up, i welcome them to. but, not till someone don't know their limits and don't respect me as a leader.
secondly, was pissed off with him. asal tukar steps jer nak muke mencengis pasal steps. and i was like fine uhhhh. malas ah nk carik steps. and plus, the girls keep wanting to change steps. korg kene ingat, ini show 2 jam. korg buat steps susah2 buat per. memenatkan diri jer.
haiz.. the whole taman warisan show is just pissing and stressing me off. urggggh.
my fyp evaluation is in 1 1/2 hrs. i am fucking stressed up lah. lama2 aku bleh jadi giler lah seh. ini stress itu stress.
haiiz.
saya sayang awak sgt2.
Thursday, August 02, 2007
exhaustion
tired. exhausted. words cant explain it all. one after the other. shows after shows.. all in the name of exposure and fun.
am so lucky to have dearest around. if not, i dun think anybody can understand the busyness that me and the Endang girls have. parents are now nagging to each and everyone of us for going back late every single day. i'm just pekak-ing my ears.
had the combined training wif Chingx3, Harapan and TKDD last nite. it was cool lah. great atmosphere. and finally, for the first time, the public knows who our instructors are and no more hiding.
haiiz. i dun understand some ppl u noe. instead of giving support to new groups, some ppl are just not happy with us. well, i understand lah maybe the color same lah kan, but it was purely accidental. geez. and also, ive got ppl wearing tudung seh in my grp, what am i supposed to do wif that??
ok lah, maybe the cara pakaian same i dun mind lahh... But! DUN ever say that cara permainan kite same. coz its NOT THE SAME.
selame nie aku main dgn korg, tkde pun henjot menghenjot atau meroyak, korg main contemp siaa. kite main ASLI! ragam kite berbeza! kitorg takde main steps belit2 nye. sume simple2. korg boleh pe main royak henjot?
hurhh. the nerves.
AGM next. ciao.
am so lucky to have dearest around. if not, i dun think anybody can understand the busyness that me and the Endang girls have. parents are now nagging to each and everyone of us for going back late every single day. i'm just pekak-ing my ears.
had the combined training wif Chingx3, Harapan and TKDD last nite. it was cool lah. great atmosphere. and finally, for the first time, the public knows who our instructors are and no more hiding.
haiiz. i dun understand some ppl u noe. instead of giving support to new groups, some ppl are just not happy with us. well, i understand lah maybe the color same lah kan, but it was purely accidental. geez. and also, ive got ppl wearing tudung seh in my grp, what am i supposed to do wif that??
ok lah, maybe the cara pakaian same i dun mind lahh... But! DUN ever say that cara permainan kite same. coz its NOT THE SAME.
selame nie aku main dgn korg, tkde pun henjot menghenjot atau meroyak, korg main contemp siaa. kite main ASLI! ragam kite berbeza! kitorg takde main steps belit2 nye. sume simple2. korg boleh pe main royak henjot?
hurhh. the nerves.
AGM next. ciao.
Friday, July 27, 2007
all dikir.
thanks lee for the last pic. love yaaa.
Ok, like i know its like damn belated for a post of the comp but yeah...
so when we report to school, i wasn't really happy when i stepped into the room, well apparently, something happend without my knowledge. so practically, i just had to control the anger and started with what i had actually planned out.
and, for 1 hour plus, we played physical theatre games, the ones i learnt when i was with Drama.Republic. The girls really enjoyed it. haha. At least they destressed. So by the time it was 2, the bus came and we went to KCC.
and, the pakcik stopped us at the main road lah instead of the carpark.
someone said,
"Kite kan low profile, nak masuk CC pun dari belakang.."
ahaa.. ape seh.. den when i reached the registration booth, i saw, Hafiz Kassim. Aizad told me that Hafiz will be there coz he's also doing dikir. and i'm like, ouhhkay. Dunno whether he still recognises me or not. Then, when i was otw to go to the holding room, i saw Nurul, Aizad's ex. She's in Balqis. Cool eh. If i'm not wrong Hafiz's in Unik.
So then the frenzy started. Sampings bengkungs selendangs serkups. pins were everywhere. lol. madness.
and then kene marah dengan cikgu when we rehearsed how to sit down. Cikgu Aliza marah sehh. ahaha. but in the end, we were briefed that we would already be seated when the curtains rise. LOL.
so, while waiting for our turn, and before us was Kelana Purba, we were jumping here and there, excited giler babi nye. And abang2 Kelana kluar, sume badan besar2 dari kite. i felt so short. and when it was our turn, like omg, we cant even hear our own voice la.. and we were like blastin and blasting but cant hear seh our voice.
but we did great. got some feedbacks that we were quite loud but suara cam suara budak2. haha. we're 15th by the way, but i think we did a very good job. I think the girls dun even care that we're 15th.
we did what we came to do. Enjoy and put a good show.
anw, congrats to Andikakencana, Wahana Deksu and Keris for getting 1st, 2nd and 3rd respectively.
to CDM and Hulubalang, thanks for the comp. =)
REPLY TO TAGS.
'SHACUTE™: Makcikkkkkkkkk! Hopefully I Can Make It On Sun, Yaww!
Pray Hard. HAHHA!ChiCka: Thanks Makcik!!! hahaha. Sunday dabes pun! hahaha =)
lee-: baek dee.....
ChiCka: baekk lee....
Nouru: Dee, Jal! Mai is now my Cousin! Maisarah Kassim is my cousin now! Go my blog see!
ChiCka: hahaha! what a coincidence!
Alamin: Heya! long time no hear or see you on MSN leh.. haha
ChiCka: heyy you! yeah, i've not been online for sometime.
aisyah badut: sape sayang awak tu! .. hhaha! .. hopeflly he knows sooner or later!
aisyah badut: pray hard lor! . ye kak cicka! hahahha! ..
ChiCka: hahahhaha! ye sayyee.. he does. =)
fish: wahhhh. i pass the test ahh! whahaha. haloo dee! *waves*
ChiCka: hey fish!! hahaha. whoaa.. you passed eh.. ahakz
anna: hey there, saw ur performance. ive been in dk for 7 yrs. i wont say its bad but u guys just need to smile k, its difficult for gerls' grp. wahana crawled a long way before they reach the top. u'l get
anna: there someday. just smile more.
ChiCka: hey there.. thanks for the advice.. really appreciate it.yeah, its difficult for gerl's grp. insya Allah, we'll make it someday.
that's done.
uhhm. i've been really2 happy these few days coz.. hahaha. well..
uhmm, yeah.
hahaha.
saya sayang awak. awak pun sayang saya jugak. happy lah saya. hahaa.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
loves.
"hidup kekurangan harta benda, merana menanggung neraka dunia"
oh trust me, i know exactly how that feels. i'm effing broke. payday's not until tmr but still, my bills are overdued. geeez. i must be the poorest in the whole commitee. lol.
oh and anyways, the Ulu Pandan performance went on well, considering the fact that we're all amateurs and beginners and it was our DEBUT. sumbs here and there but i guess we did our best. selection's around the corner.
phobia. selection reminded me of the last comp. i'm scared of it.
oh and anyways, pics of the Ulu Pandan show yeah?
sometimes, i feel that i'm not doing much as a leader. what he said hurts me like a lot but it woke me up and made me think. should i really change myself as leader? my style is definitely different from his. but should i really?
so training has been really2 tiring. been pushed to the max like giler babi lah can. but we had fun last night, menghenjot dan meroyak. LOL. sungguh the tak sopan.
i'm still waiting for someone to explain to me why she hasnt been coming to training wifout informing me. i may be nice, but its not so nice anymore when i blow my top.
so anyway, i really wanna spend time with him. i know we do that all the time but i just want the two of us to spend time. he hasnt been calling me at night. he's tired, i know..
oh ya, he said this to Adik while we went to supper.
"kau gi mintak kakak ipar kau lah.."
kakak ipar lah sangaat.. den he was like,
"eh tak. kakak angkat kau."
hahaha. saw his friendster. he grabbed my pic. like.. uhmmm. =)
oh trust me, i know exactly how that feels. i'm effing broke. payday's not until tmr but still, my bills are overdued. geeez. i must be the poorest in the whole commitee. lol.
oh and anyways, the Ulu Pandan performance went on well, considering the fact that we're all amateurs and beginners and it was our DEBUT. sumbs here and there but i guess we did our best. selection's around the corner.
phobia. selection reminded me of the last comp. i'm scared of it.
oh and anyways, pics of the Ulu Pandan show yeah?
sometimes, i feel that i'm not doing much as a leader. what he said hurts me like a lot but it woke me up and made me think. should i really change myself as leader? my style is definitely different from his. but should i really?so training has been really2 tiring. been pushed to the max like giler babi lah can. but we had fun last night, menghenjot dan meroyak. LOL. sungguh the tak sopan.
i'm still waiting for someone to explain to me why she hasnt been coming to training wifout informing me. i may be nice, but its not so nice anymore when i blow my top.
so anyway, i really wanna spend time with him. i know we do that all the time but i just want the two of us to spend time. he hasnt been calling me at night. he's tired, i know..
oh ya, he said this to Adik while we went to supper.
"kau gi mintak kakak ipar kau lah.."
kakak ipar lah sangaat.. den he was like,
"eh tak. kakak angkat kau."
hahaha. saw his friendster. he grabbed my pic. like.. uhmmm. =)
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
about love.
i've been neglecting my personal life a lot recently, due to trainings and such.
and when it comes to my love life, i'm in a total mess.
i get jealous when girls try to get close to him. i get jealous when, he gets to know other girls. i just want his attention all to me. special attention that is. i just want him all for myself.
but of course, he's not mine. oh, well.. he was mine.
Dearest,
If you only you know, how my heart is feeling right now, you'd realise how real my love is for you. It's never because of looks, or the money or the fame.
Dearest,
No one has ever shut my ego up like how you did. No one has ever made me realise how much i can do for myself. You made me someone who's so confident and made me realise that there's so much more in life.
No words can ever explain how deep my love is for you, or how badly i want us to be together again. To me, there's just no one else and it's just you baby. my only one.
Dearest,
I don't ever wanna lose you. You guide me in my life. You're my source of hope and strength. Your guidance just makes me stronger. They say, you'll only realise that you love someone badly when u lost them. That's what i'm feeling. I never thought i love you more when i lost you.
haiiz. saya sayang kamu.
and when it comes to my love life, i'm in a total mess.
i get jealous when girls try to get close to him. i get jealous when, he gets to know other girls. i just want his attention all to me. special attention that is. i just want him all for myself.
but of course, he's not mine. oh, well.. he was mine.
Dearest,
If you only you know, how my heart is feeling right now, you'd realise how real my love is for you. It's never because of looks, or the money or the fame.
Dearest,
No one has ever shut my ego up like how you did. No one has ever made me realise how much i can do for myself. You made me someone who's so confident and made me realise that there's so much more in life.
No words can ever explain how deep my love is for you, or how badly i want us to be together again. To me, there's just no one else and it's just you baby. my only one.
Dearest,
I don't ever wanna lose you. You guide me in my life. You're my source of hope and strength. Your guidance just makes me stronger. They say, you'll only realise that you love someone badly when u lost them. That's what i'm feeling. I never thought i love you more when i lost you.
haiiz. saya sayang kamu.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
To The Endangs
Dear Girls,
I know i was harsh and rough on you all yesterday but i hope you all understand my situation that we only have a few more days to the show and 1 week to the comp. I won't say all the not-so-nice things here. Its not for public to know.
But i hope you girls know, that, I feel very lucky to have great girls like you girls in my group. I couldnt have asked for more.
We started off as strangers. As days goes by, the bond grew, and you girls are now getting closer and closer like you girls have known each other for eternity. The fact that you girls and willing to learn, ask questions along the way and try your best each time, makes me so proud of you girls.
WE (as in, you know i know) have seen you girls from day 1 until now. I don't deny that u girls improve a lot. But, please.. Like WE always say,
"Korang naik sama2, korang jatuh sama2"
Remember that please.
And I know, you all were angry with this post.
But like WE said, buat bodoh. Ignorance is the best thing to do.
and like WE always say,
"Keep it low profile. We're not the kind of people who likes to tell the whole world about us. Whatever it is, jumpe jer kat atas pentas."
And, about beating Wahana Deksu, well, kite jumpe sahaja di atas pentas.
and, saya sayang kamu sume k Endangs. =)
Reply to tags:
Syasya: was here...! ader time visit2 my blog yer? senyap jek...hehe i miss ya, u know?
ChiCka: Insya Allah if i'm free i will. i miss you too laaaa.
aBLOGGER: heyy..bloghopped and land here..LOL..noe wat i'm in da same skul as u are..but i'm in 1st year..
hehe.. *smile*
ChiCka: Hey there.. haha.. leave your link lah.. who knows can make friends.. =)
atie: wahduh, muker.. maak ai
ChiCka: muke sape atie???
kelis's friend: please go mr.gorgeous vote for KELIS!
ChiCka: haha. vote for Kelis???
'SHACUTE™: Makcikkkkk! I Will Consperm With You Whether Im Coming On 22nd Or Not, Soon! Plus, Remind ME Ehhhhhh! HAHAHA!
ChiCka: ALAMAK DENIIII! Leceh sungguh. HAHAHA. RINDU BANGERT DEHHH! Cepatan yah conSPERM dengan saya.
LIN: dee bacin ! hehe. i've changed link...just change blogspot to wordpress. heh. sorry for the trouble! bye bacin. i miss u se
ChiCka: ahhaha.. okie.. I MISS YOU ALSO LAHH SLENGE.
OK END.
I know i was harsh and rough on you all yesterday but i hope you all understand my situation that we only have a few more days to the show and 1 week to the comp. I won't say all the not-so-nice things here. Its not for public to know.
But i hope you girls know, that, I feel very lucky to have great girls like you girls in my group. I couldnt have asked for more.
We started off as strangers. As days goes by, the bond grew, and you girls are now getting closer and closer like you girls have known each other for eternity. The fact that you girls and willing to learn, ask questions along the way and try your best each time, makes me so proud of you girls.
WE (as in, you know i know) have seen you girls from day 1 until now. I don't deny that u girls improve a lot. But, please.. Like WE always say,
"Korang naik sama2, korang jatuh sama2"
Remember that please.
And I know, you all were angry with this post.
6 Jul 07, 02:08
ct: endang? asl eh semua like very e interested with endang? bgs nah ke dorang? blh beat wahana deksu?But like WE said, buat bodoh. Ignorance is the best thing to do.
and like WE always say,
"Keep it low profile. We're not the kind of people who likes to tell the whole world about us. Whatever it is, jumpe jer kat atas pentas."
And, about beating Wahana Deksu, well, kite jumpe sahaja di atas pentas.
and, saya sayang kamu sume k Endangs. =)
Reply to tags:
Syasya: was here...! ader time visit2 my blog yer? senyap jek...hehe i miss ya, u know?
ChiCka: Insya Allah if i'm free i will. i miss you too laaaa.
aBLOGGER: heyy..bloghopped and land here..LOL..noe wat i'm in da same skul as u are..but i'm in 1st year..
hehe.. *smile*ChiCka: Hey there.. haha.. leave your link lah.. who knows can make friends.. =)
atie: wahduh, muker.. maak ai
ChiCka: muke sape atie???
kelis's friend: please go mr.gorgeous vote for KELIS!
ChiCka: haha. vote for Kelis???
'SHACUTE™: Makcikkkkk! I Will Consperm With You Whether Im Coming On 22nd Or Not, Soon! Plus, Remind ME Ehhhhhh! HAHAHA!
ChiCka: ALAMAK DENIIII! Leceh sungguh. HAHAHA. RINDU BANGERT DEHHH! Cepatan yah conSPERM dengan saya.
LIN: dee bacin ! hehe. i've changed link...just change blogspot to wordpress. heh. sorry for the trouble! bye bacin. i miss u se
ChiCka: ahhaha.. okie.. I MISS YOU ALSO LAHH SLENGE.
OK END.
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
fyp madness
wooh.
boy oh boy was I freaking late for fyp. haha. the meeting was supposed to start at 9.30 am but, of course being me, i couldnt wake up early. and dear Joel had to call me numerously before i finally woke up when he called. and he was like, "Dee where are you? You know what time issit now?"
and i was like, "I'm at home. What time issit now?"
and he said, "it's 11.30"
oh greatness. i reached school at 1.15. damn late lah..
and 2 hrs later, i'm not doing anything. PHP sucks big time seh. PANTAT HAI PANTAT. i love codings actually. i don't mind doing codings compared to theory. but i just need to do it alone. lol. i cant do it when there're ppl beside me coz i get distracted and i dun have the concentration.
ok. screw it. i'm cold. ahaha.
boy oh boy was I freaking late for fyp. haha. the meeting was supposed to start at 9.30 am but, of course being me, i couldnt wake up early. and dear Joel had to call me numerously before i finally woke up when he called. and he was like, "Dee where are you? You know what time issit now?"
and i was like, "I'm at home. What time issit now?"
and he said, "it's 11.30"
oh greatness. i reached school at 1.15. damn late lah..
and 2 hrs later, i'm not doing anything. PHP sucks big time seh. PANTAT HAI PANTAT. i love codings actually. i don't mind doing codings compared to theory. but i just need to do it alone. lol. i cant do it when there're ppl beside me coz i get distracted and i dun have the concentration.
ok. screw it. i'm cold. ahaha.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
endang
ohh dun u just think this is lovely??
the Endang girls with some missing acts. haha. =)
i hate pms and period. like really. its making me feel a lot of things which i shouldnt be feeling. hate it. damn bad lar.
i hate em.
meanwhile, i did some more. haha..
| Sagittarius - Your Love Profile |
 Your positive traits: Your playful nature brings out the happy inner-child in dates You're willing to take risks in love... and reap the rewards You've got a killer sense of humor that gets talking with any hottie you meet Your negative traits: Sometimes your sarcasm comes off as biting and abrasive You can be brutally honest, tactless, and truthful even when it hurts You're such a free spirit that you find it hard to commit to one person Your ideal partner: Someone high energy who will pick up and out with you whenever Is creative and fun - thinking of new adventures for the two of you Is bold... and not afraid to tell you "I love you" early on Your dating style: Unpredictable. You never know how the night is going to end up. Your seduction style: Daring. You're always pushing to try something new in the bedroom. Full of imagination. You've always got a new fantasy you're dying to try. Spiritually driven. Sex for you can be an other-worldly act. Tips for the future: Realize that while freedom is great - sometimes a stable relationship is better. It's not all about you. Focus on your partner's needs every once and a while. Make up your mind about your partner, and stick to it. Your fickle will ruin things otherwise. Best color to attract mate: Purple Best day for a date: Thursday |
| You May Be a Bit Dependent... |
 You're more than a little preoccupied with being abandoned. You need a lot of support in your life, at all times. It's difficult for you to survive on your own... And you don't reallly think you ever could. |
Your Inner Retro Girl Is |
 |
GOTH LAH SANGAAAT. =)
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
JANGKIT
You Would Choose Money |
 You know that love doesn't always last forever - but money can. Why bother with jealousy, petty fights, and hurt feelings? You rather just go shopping! And while marrying for money may be lonely, you'll always be well dressed, well traveled, and well fed. |
| You Are Very Happy Being Single |
 You're not anti-relationship. You just don't need one to be content. You find plenty of happiness from your life as it is. And if you find someone you love, then that's just icing on an already decadent cake! |
| Your Personality Profile |
 You are elegant, withdrawn, and brilliant. Your mind is a weapon, able to solve any puzzle. You are also great at poking holes in arguments and common beliefs. For you, comfort and calm are very important. You tend to thrive on your own and shrug off most affection. You prefer to protect your emotions and stay strong. |
You Have a Phlegmatic Temperament |
 Mild mannered and laid back, you take life at a slow pace. You are very consistent - both in emotions and actions. You tend to absorb set backs easily. You are cool and collected. It is difficult to offend you. You can remain composed and unemotional. You are a great friend and lover. You don't demand much of others. While you are quiet, you have a subtle wit that your friends know well. At your worst, you are lazy and unwilling to work at anything. You often get stuck in a rut, without aspirations or dreams. You can get too dependent on others, setting yourself up for abandonment. |
| You Are 95% Burned Out |
 You are extremely burned out. You work too hard, and you're not getting the results you deserve. It's time for a life change, as soon as you can manage it. You're giving away most of your energy to something you don't even enjoy. |
| You Are Really Not Happy |
 You may have noticed that things aren't going too well for you lately. Your life never used to be like this, but it seems like happiness is slipping away from you. You definitely need a change, because whatever you have going on isn't working. It's time for you to shake things up - even if it means totally changing your life path. |
HAHA.
Damn bored lah can? Geez.. Jangkit survey from the Endang girls. Lolz..
Anyway, training has been really intensive these few days. But the girls have been doing great.. I'm really proud of them actually. At least they take the initiative to learn.
And there're a few, who.. kinda disappoint me abit. Let's not mention names. But, i really do not appreciate people who are not humble and don't take iniative. And, please remember, you're not experienced, you gotta ask and learn. And, i hate know-it-alls. When someone teach, you listen. And try to improve. Don't say you can do it and still, give the same.
Okay, need to go for meeting. Ciao.
Monday, June 25, 2007
grrr.
seriously. i cried teared.
how idiotic can someone be? telling me that he's migrating and never coming back. and how idiotic can it be, when that someone, is the one you love?
and can u imagine the whole situation which i thought?
"someone you love is going to migrate and never coming back."
bitch.
its enuff already that i lost him emotionally. i'm not gonna lose him physically. not anymore.
and i teared, wanting to cry but luckily i was in class, so i couldnt. and was just sms-ing with him, trying to make him stay, and i gave up.. and i said, well okay, gd luck in your future then.
and he msged me back saying he was bored and it was just a prank.
URGGGGGHH!!!
dearest, i just don't know how to tell you that i still love you. and it's been 3 months. and i still cant forget about you. you used to say, "maybe ade hikmah di sebalik ape yg terjadi kat kite.." hikmah aper? all i'm feeling is hurt. all i'm getting is loneliness.
i love you so much that it hurts.
how idiotic can someone be? telling me that he's migrating and never coming back. and how idiotic can it be, when that someone, is the one you love?
and can u imagine the whole situation which i thought?
"someone you love is going to migrate and never coming back."
bitch.
its enuff already that i lost him emotionally. i'm not gonna lose him physically. not anymore.
and i teared, wanting to cry but luckily i was in class, so i couldnt. and was just sms-ing with him, trying to make him stay, and i gave up.. and i said, well okay, gd luck in your future then.
and he msged me back saying he was bored and it was just a prank.
URGGGGGHH!!!
dearest, i just don't know how to tell you that i still love you. and it's been 3 months. and i still cant forget about you. you used to say, "maybe ade hikmah di sebalik ape yg terjadi kat kite.." hikmah aper? all i'm feeling is hurt. all i'm getting is loneliness.
i love you so much that it hurts.
LALALA
guess what?
i'm bored. financial accounting class sucks. i am so not gonna take it again. in the mean time, haha. i'm gonna do loads of blogthings stuff.
okay, i'm getting tired of doing surveys. haha.
the last survey is kinda true i guess. i'm picky when it comes to guys. hurhurhur. it's like, everytime i know someone, i tend to find faults, and see his imperfections and then, just leave em stranded. coz my expectation of someone is kinda high i guess. but the thing is, if i don't feel right for the guy, how can we even be in a relationship?
enuff about that.
yet again, i was lectured by abang zaid.
he asked, "so how's your studies going on? are you focusing more on your studies or your dikir?"
and i sheepishly said, "dikir"
and yeah, thats how the lecture came about. i came to school only once last week. i couldnt wake up. blah2.. and he said, if i don't start focusing on school, he's gonna make me stop dikir. wadderr.. haiiz..
i seriously miss a whole bunch of people.
i miss my smoking khakis in Adiratna.
I MISS FAZLIANA TETEK. I MISS SHIDAH. I MISS NADIA (of course, Nadia's not in Adiratna).
I MISS MY DRAMA MATES.
I MISS MY COUSIN DIANA VANDERH.
I MISS NOURU, JALILAH, RIDZ AND RUBY.
I MISS AISYAH AND SHAE.
I MISS JAY-JAY.
I MISS THE BULLDOZER.
2nd LASTLY,
I MISS MY PANTATS!
and lastly,
I MISS LEANNA JAZZ AND KHAIRUL!!!
HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY LEANNA!
THE SHOWGIRL AND MONA LISA.
i'm bored. financial accounting class sucks. i am so not gonna take it again. in the mean time, haha. i'm gonna do loads of blogthings stuff.
| You Are 77% Perfectionist |
 You are a true perfectionist. You are both demanding of yourself and others. While it's great to have goals and standards, they don't need to be sky high! |
| You Are 76% Open Minded |
 You are so open minded that your brain may have fallen out! Well, not really. But you may be confused on where you stand. You don't have a judgemental bone in your body, and you're very accepting. You enjoy the best of every life philosophy, even if you sometimes contradict yourself. |
| You Are Low Maintenance |
 Otherwise known as "too good to be true" You're one laid back chica - and men love that! Just remember that no good guy likes a doormat. So if you find your self going along to get along... Stop yourself and put up a little bit of a fight. |
| You Don't Have a Boyfriend Because You are Too Picky |
 You have no problem attracting guys - and even dating a little It's just around second or third date time where you start to see faults If a guy isn't near perfect, you're not into him. It's good to have standards - but yours rule almost everyone out. |
okay, i'm getting tired of doing surveys. haha.
the last survey is kinda true i guess. i'm picky when it comes to guys. hurhurhur. it's like, everytime i know someone, i tend to find faults, and see his imperfections and then, just leave em stranded. coz my expectation of someone is kinda high i guess. but the thing is, if i don't feel right for the guy, how can we even be in a relationship?
enuff about that.
yet again, i was lectured by abang zaid.
he asked, "so how's your studies going on? are you focusing more on your studies or your dikir?"
and i sheepishly said, "dikir"
and yeah, thats how the lecture came about. i came to school only once last week. i couldnt wake up. blah2.. and he said, if i don't start focusing on school, he's gonna make me stop dikir. wadderr.. haiiz..
i seriously miss a whole bunch of people.
i miss my smoking khakis in Adiratna.
I MISS FAZLIANA TETEK. I MISS SHIDAH. I MISS NADIA (of course, Nadia's not in Adiratna).
I MISS MY DRAMA MATES.
I MISS MY COUSIN DIANA VANDERH.
I MISS NOURU, JALILAH, RIDZ AND RUBY.
I MISS AISYAH AND SHAE.
I MISS JAY-JAY.
I MISS THE BULLDOZER.
2nd LASTLY,I MISS MY PANTATS!
and lastly,
I MISS LEANNA JAZZ AND KHAIRUL!!!
HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY LEANNA!
THE SHOWGIRL AND MONA LISA.
missing them all.
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