Insecurities

I'm just feeling so insecure today.. shucks.. it's all that din's fault... din is Ayul's friend, btw... i mean, yeah i noe i shouldnt haf sent him that testimonial... but then, in was just joking on the things i said.. he got so defensive and called me names... like, whatever....

but stuff which he said really hurt me bad... like: "kau dah tak lawa tu nk step jambu".. which means, act chio buay chio... sigh.. i mean i realise i'm not that pretty but u dun haf to tell me straight in the face u noe... shucks.. and i've nv acted as if i was pretty... sigh... and he was went abt:"i noe wad u guys do and stuff..." wtf... and he said me and Ayul tak setaraf... erm, like... not equal... some sorta status kinda thing... wad the heck!

I dunno wad i did to him that made him so anti-me.... all because i'm not pretty??? haizz... tt is so dissapointing... how can he judge me by just my appearance??? i did nth to him and he was the one hu msged me first in friendster...

And because of his crude remarks, i'm actually getting insecure abt stuff... it kinda made me think y Ayul chose me among other girls.. i mean, he can get better and prettier girls wad... y the heck did he chose me??? honestly, i do admit that i'm just average and simple.. i try my best to be stylish... but i'm not up there yet... i just feel insecure.. heck! haizz... i really love Ayul and i just dunno how i'll move on in life w/o him by my side... haizz...

i'm wondering y alot of ppl are against our relationship... dunno wad went wrong... haiz...

But i noe dis...

I LOVE AYUL!!!