Shucks

Hey it's June!!! Only left wit 2 days of school den the holls are here!! Yay!!! Wheeee.... Haha...

Sigh.. I quarrelled wit Ayul yesterday. Crap la.. Just because of a small thing and bof of us blew up on each other.. Sigh.. My fault la coz i used the wrong tone on him.. He was joking ar but dunno y i sorta blew up.. Den, he hung up the fon on me.. Gave him a miss call and he called back. I cant help but cry. Sigh.. I was so friggin pissed off la.. Haiz... Argued fer a while den we cooled down ah.. Sigh.. Really bad.. He gave in.. Sigh... I dunno y i was so defensive yesterday and i didnt want to give in..

But we were ok ah after that, started talking and just, dun wanna remember abt the arguement. But den, he brought up the topic of other girls liking him and his ex still loved him and stuff.. I didnt really feel anything yesterday nite when he told me bout it. I didnt wanna noe too.. But i had to.. hmm...

Honestly, i dunno if i trust him too much or i just didnt wanna care... I mean, if he really loves me den he should noe better and not do anything stupid to break my heart. Or, IF he doesnt love me anymore, den i haf nth to say arh.. It's completely up to him.. I cant say anything much coz its his heart and not mine.. Wouldnt wanna influence him in any way..

I love him waaay too much.. I dun want him to leave me and neither do i want him to be unhappy abt being with me.. Its just bad enuff for me.. I dunno wad i'll do when he leaves me one day.. Maybe i wouldnt even wanna go into another relationship coz nobody can replace him.. His care and concern, his love, his intimacy, his humour, his controlled ways, his kisses and hugs, his belo-ness.. HE IS EVERYTHING TO ME NOW and i wouldnt trade that for anything...

I LOVE AYUL!