and i fell again.

well, not literally fell.. and not metaphorically falling as well.

i've been kinda depressed lately, which, i have no idea why. it just sucks to feel the way i'm feeling. the emptiness inside is really killing me. it's not about love, i guess. i'm not sure. pms maybe?

haa wells.. the emptiness.. i guess it's because me and someone had a misunderstanding and we're not contacting. which, just sucks lah since he's like, one of the closest person i haf in my life. it's crappy. i shldnt have done wad i did.

i'm sorry friend. my blog song goes out to you.

i was on the train the other day, and was checking my wallet out when i found these 2 pictures, still intact in it.

i still keep them in my wallet. i dunno why i didnt take them out. blame it on procrastination? i dun think so.. it just feel so... right in my wallet.. i mean, we've gone thru this before, he doesnt want me back, and neither do i.. i mean, it's just the parents and time factor. now, my love is just channeled to us being friends that's all. just mere friends. tts all i can afford.

haiz.. okay, shld not talk abt him anymore.. he's hurt. i'm also hurt. but our hurt is about 2 different things.

howells...

so, yesterday, i went on a date! ahakz. it's wif Farhan, who used to work at Beach Stations' Coffee Bean. He's half Malay and half Eurasian. Haha.. We went to eat at LJS, den went smoke, den went to watch Pirates of the Carribean at Causeway Point. Hee. Had fun..

But, like wad i used to tell Ayien, u keep urself busy in the morning, and u haf fun so that u dun really think of ur problems. But at night, u'll suffer the worst part of your life wif your tormenting feelings and such.

sigh..

i really miss that person. loving someone you know u cant get is tough. but to love doesnt mean to possess. haiz..

haiz.. looks like my schedule is gonna be jammed pack again. argh. the Art's Fest is gonna be tmr, den weekends work, den after that gonna be busy training wif Adiratna for the dikir competition that's gonna be on 26th August. It's gonna be my first ever Dikir competition. It's gonna be good exposure uh.

but, then again, i'm overworking myself. why issit always this part of the year that i'm always overworking myself each year? haiz.. i'm tired. i need a break. but at the same time, i dun wanna let go of these opportunities. haiz..

haiz.. kinda down laa. shitstuff. ARGH!